Wait...if you're a part of a wedding you have to pay for your shit? Fuck that, if you want such a fucking special day, you pay for this shit. And you've already got to get them a gift...

50 is real small. and dangerous. it's easy to stop a clearly drunk person out of 50. 200-250? not so much.

I've actually said no to being in weddings. I'm so lazy and such a nihilist I say I'm flattered and I'm willing to help out in any way I can on the wedding day, but I just can't afford it.

I had 4 weddings this summer/fall, 3 that I was in the wedding party. It's gets ridiculously expensive. I got a bunch more this year. I'm 25, I didn't think this shit was start this soon.

It's the popular thing to do. Especially around the holidays, apparently everyone is now fucking engaged.

STOP. GETTING. ENGAGED.

Oh yeah.

Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no.

New Years was forgettable.

Also, just because the diner has a liquor license, doesn't mean that you need another gin and tonic at 4am to go with your cheese fries.

Lesson from this New Year's: Never order a Long Island Ice Tea after 1am after drinking for most of the night. Even if someone else is paying.

Now that's a hit.

I do love that Big 10 commercial with Explosions In The Sky, though. I could honestly listen to them all day.

You know, we're all focused on the Song Girls, but those Penn State cheerleaders are nothing I'd throw out of bed.

Keep up the good work, Penn.

Okay, ABC, bitch a little more about Joe Paterno not coming by for his interview.

I would go to the gym more often if there was a buffet table, actually.

You get a star just for being the lone reader of Oddjack.

You know, we should really have planned this in advance. I'd have been more than happy to have a bunch of other curmudgeonly Deadspinners down for New Years. Nothing like staying off the roads, in the house, and drinking whilst in your floppy clothes.

hot dress=freezing your ass off tonight