HAHAHAHA.

Yeah, but he’s a billionaire so the dough is made from artisanal wheat grown in fields of gold-flecked soil tended by 7 farmers, one from each continent*, selected for their sure, steady hands and love of the land.

She apparently deleted every public accusation, but because she became bored of the lies—not because Aubrey called his lawyers.

Considering her ex is experiencing money issues (and he’s a total barf bag) I am not hating Amber flaunting her relationship with a billionaire. Get it girl!

Damn, I know The Root has trolls, but two-thirds of the comments are racist grey trolls, lol

This is hilarious.

Look up his response to whether he supports the G.I. Bill. He obviously has no idea it’s a program to provide college tuition for veterans.

Oh no, those procrastinating stoners’ papers are far more intelligible (and intelligent) than this pablum Trump’s dribbling.

Nice try dude. You had me going on the little story at the top. Then BLARGH DEMOCRATS ARE THE RACISTS. BEN CARSON!

Studied linguistics for awhile (not long enough), but here it is: Dementia + speed = Trumpese. He has parts of the syntax correct and some command of the language, but it’s fading badly. He keeps re-using the same exact bland adjectives. And then forgetting nouns and full thoughts. the ability to form logical thoughts…

Not a linguist but studied it and various dead and alive languages in school, and had a close family member with dementia. I think his speech patterns sound like a combo of senility on the verge of dementia, lots of amphetamines, and his deep-seated fear that his deep truth is being laid bare, and he knows he is a…

I think you might also want to include neurologists.

This is the speech pattern that grandpa has right before you have the uncomfortable conversation where you tell him he can’t live by himself anymore.

Linguists and language teachers, please weigh in. The last time I asked this it was fascinating. Hypotheses on what this imp’s language tells us about his non-abilities and attempts to speak?

Still convinced he abuses prescription amphetamines. I feel like he’d see himself as too sophisticated for coke but could easily convince himself some uppers from a doctor are a-ok.

Christ, he sounds like a stoner trying to shit out a term paper two hours before it’s due and he missed the entire semester.

the most unintelligible part of this whole thing i not only bringing up the election again, but getting the electoral college wrong AGAIN! It’s been sith months almost. Who thinks democrats have an advantage there and how?!

I have said this before and it never stops being true: Donnie sounds like someone trying to have a serious conversation on a ball of cocaine. I really can’t listen to him talk, and when I read the shit he said, he sounds like a puppy that has too many shiny objects and noise makers around it.