I meant to list Bob Ross! I guess that even just seeing an image of his Funko Pop incarnation online was enough to put me in a relaxed, hazy, and slightly forgetful state of mind...

It’s definitely what Occam’s Razor would suggest. But the breadth of the license subjects (Atom Ant vs. the Rocky Horror Picture Show), and the grand disparity between their merchandising heft, and therefore cost (Elvira, Mistress of the Dark, but also MICKEY F’N MOUSE??) make me doubt your “union of reps” idea. …

1st ed., Ghasts stink enough to debuff you, have an extra HD, and are turned one slot higher by clerics.

How dare you defile my pure and beautiful acts of zoophilia by hatefully calling them “bestiality!”

I’ve never really found anything to admire in the storied deeds of the great captains of industry, or the accomplishments of visionary entrepreneurs, or the successes of businessmen on any level, really. But with God as my witness, I would work a 60-hour week at the worst retail joint in the nation, entirely without…

#AllBearsMatter.

That “tallest building west of the Mississippi” claim is bullshit. The U.S. Bank Tower, at 1,018 feet, and with a top floor height of 968 feet, is the tallest building in L.A. The Wilshire Grand claims to be 1,100 feet tall, but its roof is only 934 feet high, with the difference made up by a purely “decorative” 295…

I am so pissed at Cracked for firing all there AV team pretty much fucking EVERYBODY [...] I was really liking this segment content that wasn’t just Pictofacts[...]

Huh. Well your name sure checks out.

As a reader I wish this story had been kept close to the vest.

Brenner—who carefully distinguishes himself from someone with an interest in bestiality, emphasizing the emotional connection he seeks with non-human companions[...]

Hand to heart, it hadn’t even occurred to me to question my first assumption, which was that the wearer of the shirt would willingly surrender their earthbending or firebending powers for a chance to bone a Kardashian.

Well, to be fair, John Kerry does look like the love child of Robert Mueller and Jabba’s torture droid:

Okay, first you wrote

This was my experience in high school, too. The gulf between 16 y.o. (dude) me and the college sophomores who seemed to date all my 16 y.o. (gal) classmates was just too vast. A “date” with me would have involved my parents driving us to a PG-13 movie, with maybe an ice cream cone afterwards, while a date with Chad…

Aw, you’re selling yourself short, my friend. Surely, a woman like that would inspire a man to at least 20 minutes of greatness!

I hear you. For the uninitiated, an example of melanin-enriched timelessness:

Holy shit, I just totally got ninja’ed by you.

That lying-ass wall eyed swamp frog is due neither courtesy nor consideration.