My favorite version of this recently was Rush Limbaugh putting his foot straight into it by implying that people are flying off the handle by calling what Trump bragged about in the pussy-grabbing tapes being sexual assualt. He tried to get all ‘crazy liberals with their political correctness’ about it, but what he…

That was why it was so annoying! Like, don’t treat me like I’m a boring nerd when you chose to ask about the boring thing! I lived in a country that’s a literal state sponsor of terrorism by choice! I was attacked by a creature that lives in the sea but has a parrot’s beak for a mouth! I chose to spend my 30th…

Amaze.

Yeah, and the 5 stories isn’t all they make you do. Part of the paperwork they make you fill out (once you’re already selected for the show, but still) is 7-10 pages of answers to questions about “What was the most amazing trip you’ve ever been on” and things like that, to kind of get you primed to be in that…

I know you’re joking but I will bet you $5 you’re at least partially right.

Right? I read this tweet and literally put my hand up to my mouth and breathed, “Ho-lee shit” as my eyes got huge. Like, I’ve been known to drop some cruel truths in my lifetime, but from this I have learned that I know nothing about nothing in the world of burning other people the fuck down.

It is becoming obvious to me that the men of Lake Woebegone are so good-looking because every morning they bathe their faces in the blood of the vanquished.

This election has recently been just dripping with unadulterated venom and it’s great. In a normal year, nothing would ever top this tweet in my affections, but Keillor may just be able to do it.

Adding this one just because, while I haven’t got a patch on Daveed Diggs in any arena, he very much expresses my feelings in this version.

This may well be my office Christmas party dress this year.

Damn, NYT, at least leave some part of him standing to limp home to his momma.

It is driving me crazy that the video player on their website (since I couldn’t get the embedded video here to work) is way too large for the screen once you account for the Wired branding across the top of the screen. I can either see Lucy and Bruce OR the video clip they’re reacting to, but not both.

I’m not going to be taking seriously any statements about “the stupidity of both sides” from a person who thinks this whole thing is actually about armrests.

I think it’s important to note that there’s an obvious soupçon of “This is a dumbshit argument to make, but since you’re making it, it also happens to be wrong” to this article. Whether the armrests moved or not has literally no bearing on whether the accusation is true, but if that’s really the thing Trump’s…

I have literally just described at least 3 ways Alex Trebek, though not the situation, “put me out.” In fact, that is the majority of the content of my comments. Try to keep up.

I can’t say anything about Alex other than the way he treated me and that one other person who I feel so badly for - they don’t let him hang around. Literally the only interaction contestants have with him other than what you see on TV is that they let you take a picture with him behind your podium.

Thanks so much! My plan actually got scuttled because my initial trip’s flights (to Ecuador) got canceled due to Hurricane Matthew, but I was able to reschedule and I’ll be going on Sunday! I guess I’m kind of sad not to be crossing the equator for the first time as the clock turns to 12.01 on my 31st birthday, but…

1. I was attacked by an octopus, 2. On my 30th birthday, I went on a trip to Scotland to see Neolithic architecture, 3. I recently lived in Sudan for a year as a teacher, and 4. I’m planning to cross the equator for the first time on my 31st birthday.

I was on Jeopardy and it hasn’t aired yet. He was kind of dismissive of me (and of the 5 stories I gave them beforehand, chose to talk about the one that I only put in there so that I’d have the 5 he asked for - literally any one of the first 4 would have been amazing, and he chose the boring one, and THEN was…

Wolfeboro is also home to a summer camp for privileged-but-delinquent boys. My high school best friend (incredibly privileged, would definitely have been kicked out of our lower-tier private high school if his mother hadn’t been head of the parent’s committee and donated lots of money) was sent there one summer as…