My dickneshness is only overshadowed by your fear.

“I want to go to paradise. Where there is happiness and joy. Where there are no problems. There I get all I want. I get to be with the 70 virgins. Here our life is full of problems.”.

I know. How dare they try to be honest about why people do the things that they do!

Thanks, that’s great. I’d like the file on the Trump campaign and the Russian government, when you have a moment.

Hey You. Yes, you. Engaging someone in a conversation and then deleting it when you don’t like how it goes is something even diehard Democrat dingbats can agree is a chickenshit move.

The truth is, most driving is boring these days, regardless of what you’re driving. The daily traffic-riddled commute, popping out for groceries, etc. I do those things in a highly entertaining car, and they still aren’t exactly what I’d call fun.

Comey is not good. Trump firing him during the course of an investigation is EXTRA not good.

I agree with you in general, but do you think it is the same for a graduation speaker? It’s not that she’s addressing the student body, but graduation is not really, to me at least, the moment for hearing opposing views and listening respectfully to people you disagree with. It’s a celebration for these students,…

“The idea of the president of the United States essentially threatening a witness, he’s basically accusing her of leaking, we have never had that before. We’ve never had presidents who did this kind of thing. The idea that the president—the guy who’s in charge of the Justice Department—is threatening a witness is…

The idea that the president—the guy who’s in charge of the Justice Department—is threatening a witness is really kind of disturbing.”

Since you’re on the topic of unprecedented, maybe they could go as far as doing something else unprecedented? Like bringing back the old president for a 3rd term or on a month to month contractual basis?

Look, the yuman body only has a finite amount of energy, so climbing ropes just takes away from energy you could be using to play golf or make yuuuuge deals. The best deals. I could climb that rope if I wanted to. People always tell me, you climb that rope farther than anybody.

Dear Republicans,

You can have my hot glue gun when you pry it from my hand with some kind of solvent.

Dishonesty, plagerism and cheating are the new norm in “Trump’s ‘Murica”. Sad.

“What were you thinking? You could have been robbed!”

Was she the perfect candidate? Absolutely not. Hell no. Terribly flawed.

This, but with Bill O’Reilly...

I knew it, I knew it, I knew it!! Elvis is alive and the Canadians have built him a car!!

This is so weird, but my favorite scene in Amistad has to be Djimon Hounsou beating the heat with an icy cold drink and sharing his thoughts with his friends back home on his phone. Slavery: It's like going to a baseball game.