"Your page has been visited by an employee of Biogenesis. To reveal who, upgrade to pro!"

Conspiracy theory: the video leaked b/c Revel Casino closed and whoever had the video didn't care about losing his/her job.

Eli Manning has played in a million games in a row. At this point, he's going to beat Jimmy Hoffa for most games attended, and he was buried at the old stadium!

Flooded field? Pansies. At least it was water. - Oakland A's ground crew

But since they're the eagles he and Flipper got booed and someone threw a D-Cell battery

Obligatory Simpsons reference!

Can we just declare the ice bucket thing over? Paul Bissonette has already won this challenge:

I think I figured out why they really shut down the comments. Look what's back on ESPN.com. I wouldn't want to see this either: GREGGGGGGGG is back!!!

I can never not laugh at a Dead Parrot joke.... so perfect.

"Never trust an owner who plays a musical instrument."

I haven't seen people yell about Balfour like that since 1917!!

Oh cool, the Sabres' owner is bidding. I guess their first signing is going to be Ryan Miller for an outrageous contract and then they'll be unable to afford actual professional players.

This is all well and good, but gotta give it to the Spanish, Italian, etc leagues... pretty much every league except the BPL... for going through this exercise and then selling their TV rights to BeIN which has absolutely zero exposure and access in almost 99% of the country! Let's give them a product and then…

Why would anyone do that? Why would anyone eat an egg bagel?!?!

This makes me so glad they never made a Dragonball movie. It would be so bad. I repeat: THEY. NEVER. MADE. A DRAGONBALL MOVIE. Such a thing would ruin so many careers and go down in history as so bad that people would erase it from their memories.

Derek Jeter is such a classy guy... oh wait, we're not doing that here?

This commercial needs more Fruit of the Loom T-shirts and talking labels.

"Don't touch me"

Messi got the golden boot, and all he got was a blo.....

The Mets have had the same promotion all season: "come see the whole team do a downward facing dog"