50% of the ads will be for Masterchef Canada. 

Sure. The money is definitely better going to Paul Allen. He needs it much more than the guy putting his health on the line on the field.

Tom Brady just had that fan relocated to San Francisco. 

“That’s a cool trick, Anna. But let me show you how to make a first round pick disappear.” -Vlade Divac

She’s one of the most unfairly criticized, and mistreated athletes in her profession. What you call “worship” others call balancing the scale to the poor treatment she often receives

Next time go with Farsi instead of Arabic.

Bah gawd, that’s Zinedine Zidane’s music!!!

Waiter: Would you like some pepper, Mr. West?

You guys should get her credentialed for Pacers-Warriors next year, cover her covering the game. 

Iris > anyone on staff here, honestly

Travel Tip: If you’re spending a day at Niagara Falls and want to see both sides of the falls, don’t try to drive across. You’re much better parking on the American side, taking in those sights, then WALKING across the Rainbow Bridge. This saves a lot of time stuck in traffic, plus you get some amazing views. Best of…

Canadian side: You can park in the Skylon Tower parking lot all day for $6.  You don’t need to buy a ticket for the tower.

99% sure he used English. Most Spaniards speak it at least passably—certainly well enough to say “your father sucks Sepp Blatter’s cock”—and it’s by far the most widely used second language in the world.

Female soccer player: it’s great to have a lively game, free of the ugly tone and harassment o-
Kangaroo: *Bounding in from off the field* NOT ALLLL MEEEEEEEN!!

Also, instead of accumulating reds and yellows to allow the other team to advance, thus resulting in possible suspensions to your own players, wouldn’t letting the other team simply score be better?

You forgot to include the obviously better alternative for a seventh(!) tiebreaker that makes this option so extremely stupid.

Counterpoint: an indicator based on play on the field is always better than drawing lots. Sure cards can be somewhat arbitrary, but the game itself is often pretty damn arbitrary.

They lost to Trinidad & Tobago