I like the WRX, but not the flat-bill Monster hat that is required for ownership.

Except that’s a Bugatti Veyron

I once saw a Lambo in a pond:

Starred for the haircut reference.

Miata is always the answer.

That Jeep may be hip-deep in mud, have a broken drive shaft and other assorted problems, but do NOT call it shitty. Any XJ that dies off-roading deserves our respect.

I have a theory that there has never once been an off-road video posted on the Internet where someone doesn’t comment on how easy it is and how they could do it in a far simpler, more basic vehicle. (Seriously — go check the comments section in off-roading YouTube videos.)

Please drive very, very far away from me. I WANT TO LIVE.

Clearly, Luda did not Get Out The Way.

Don’t you mean;

I miss the Saabaru. Everything good about the WRX, made better. And then it was gone like Keyser Soze.

Saabaru 92x Aero Love!!!!

How about a weird Saab-badged version of the bugeye Impreza:

The one that costs under 4 grand

This is the greatest troll in the history of Jalopnik. You win, good sir.

Best first car should be wayyyy less than $25k. I’d have to say find the nicest one of these:

If I woke up tomorrow and I was a 16 year old about to get my license and had 25 grand for a first car, I’d want a late model Toyota Sienna. Think about it.

270 horsepower is enough to have fun with. You have seatbelts for eight people, meaning you can fit about thirty teenagers in it. And most importantly, you don’t…

The answer is always...

Doug, you only have good ideas. #Doug2016. Count me in for a $15,000 E46 with a sport suspension package.

Without question, the 1996-1999 Ford Taurus. This heaping pile of garbage is not only thee ugliest production vehicle of all time, but they were agonizingly popular. You couldn’t go anywhere in the 90s/early 00s without seeing one of these atrocities. Since their bastardized conception, there hasn’t been anything I’ve …