“Whenever I erect anything”

It’s Australia, gravity brings things up, not down.

It’s why in first world countries signs are attached like this:

I’m no structural engineer, though I do know a few. That giant sign sticking straight up off the beam without support at the top looks like a terrible terrible design. Its basically a sail.

I hate that I like the Bears.

That is highly unsafe and deserves to be snitched on, gorillas are sentient beings, not rooftop sax slaves

the team believes the complaint originated from “a disgruntled season ticket holder that dislikes our creative director.”

I’ve always thought it tragic that native born people can’t be deported. If I was emperor, I’d allow a 1.5 to 1 swap.

One day, when I’m president, we’ll ship every bro truck owner and stance driver to Guam.

This. This is objectively the worst Will Ferrell movie. The pits.

Aerostar, my dude.

The FBI declined to investigate something that would implicate rich white men?!? No. Way.

Seems like this is an update to the old way VW used to say “fuck you”:

I LIVE HERE IN CLEVELAND!!!! THIS IS MY BANK!!!! I AM NOT SURPRISED!!!!

Damn. He had to hold out for three weeks? Companies are paying tri-weekly now?

Y’all, keep in mind that the check was $1,000 for THREE WEEKS of pay. A nigga can’t even make over $300 a week without raising suspicion. 

Range Rover owners really shouldn’t cry about this.

I don’t think the Range Rover got stuck so much as it decided to just break at the worst possible moment. Oh well, keep calm and carry on I suppose.