My dog figured out how to open the refrigerator on her own. I came home and she had completely cleared out $200 worth of groceries, and was lying on the kitchen floor surrounded by the remains of her kill, too stuffed to even get up and go hide under the bed. The butter tub was licked clean, literally everything…

My dog went into the kitchen once, pulled out an empty chili container from the trash and brought it back to us. She plopped down in front of us and started to work on licking out the chili leavings. Like "HOW YOU GUYS DOIN'; I GOT CHILI." When we tried to take it from her she was like "EXCUSE ME, ASSHOLES THAT IS…

D'aww! Adorable otters.

Well, how else are you gonna stand out when you get married the same weekend as Amal Alamuddin and what's-his-face?

The face of a man who knows he's lucky as all hell.

Noth will be one spoiled rotten individual

I met Prince Harry. And touched him. And had a picture made. He smiled, laughed, and talked. I nearly pushed my husband off the bench so there would be room between us.
Backstory: May 2013 His Royal Hotness came to Walter Reed-Bethesda to visit wounded warriors. Since my dream man is one (war sucks, umkay), we got the…

I call shenanigans. Prince George is clearly the best royal. It's the combination of chubby cheeks and utter disdain for everything around him.

I'd like Satines headpiece. I wouldn't say no if the collar came with it.

Pretty much everything Rosalind Russel wore in Auntie Mame

Those boots are nice Dodai but for me it's all about the jacket.

Oh and this Jayne Mansfield ensemble.

Also a lot of what Michelle Pfeiffer wore in Married to the Mob.

Two questions. How is he not in pain and where did it go? Where did it GO?

Somehow, I don't think that question was about the identity of the wearer of the VAGINA MAKER.

Jesus. Who pissed in your Cheerios?

Eep! The word gimmick makes me cringe. It's more like their 'thing.' They are n't just a band...they put on a total show. Unless you've been there, it's hard to explain. I saw them many times, but the best was in SF years and years ago. They actually set up a wrestling ring on stage and had a whole fight thing going…

GWAR are hands down the best performance artists of the past 20 years. They are caustic, witty, sophomoric, intelligent, angry and fun at the same time. Even if you dislike metal, go see them live. You will not be disappointed.

Oh its SOOOOOOOOO cute! My 2 year old insisted (loudly) yesterday that she needed her uuumbwewah because it was raining. Today she took a whole minute to spit out the word "wain coat". She owns neither an umbrella nor a rain coat.

She got held up at a border in Brazil because her passport said Her Grace Deborah Vivien Cavendish, Duchess of Devonshire" and she was like "yup, those are all me."