"I'm still a little confused about my options, though. Can we get national security framed as a matter of shoe selection?"

"Shh. Just relax. Sit back and watch me mispronounce 'penguins.'"

I never realized Corgis didn't have tails. That big pink anus is mesmerizing.

Sunglasses are acceptable as long as it is 90% sunny outside. Anything less and you are being a frigid bitch. Do I need to send you a copy of The Rules again?

"But I can't - because you're always walking around with your damn earbuds in ("Don't talk to me!") and your sunglasses on, even when they're not necessary."

#notallthesingleladies

do NOT contact me with unsolicited services or offers

Local Chicago woman likes to scowl at all times, gives zero fucks if you find her unapproachable.

ALL the single ladies.

she really must have the WORST sex if she's super convinced no one has sex with an equally willing partner.

Consent Laws Are Ruining Sex, Says Writer Who Probably Has Awful Sex Does Not Have Sex.

Funny that she mentioned "presumed" states of being. It reminds me of how women are presumed to be consenting unless otherwise stated.

"Mother died today. Or maybe yesterday; I can't be sure."

Those first few sentences flew right past me in my rush to see this French idiot.

Am I wrong to think that Kara was just quoting Camus, and her mother hasn't actually died (today or yesterday)?

I'm tired of this. We focus on teaching women not to be raped; now we are starting to focus on teaching everyone around a potential victim to stop her from getting raped. There is still so little that is actually geared towards the criminal themselves.

Almost as unhinged as a guy who posts on the site all day long every day whining and complaining about how unreasonable and meeeeeeeeean women are.

#notallmen, amirite?

Y'know, if we'd just smile and spread our legs for fuck's sake, none of this would even happen. It's like we don't even WANT to stop the problem.

Protection of a male relative isn't always a good thing: