I’m comfortable in my shitbaggery. I got my parade. Fucking coasting for the rest of my sports fan life.

I’m going to assume this is a serious question and offer a serious answer. It’s from Parks and Rec. A running joke on the show was the murals adorning the halls of the city government building depicting all of the hilariously terrible events in the city’s history.

What amazed me about Mane’s goal was that he did it in stride. There was no wind up. It’s like a QB flicking a 50-yard bomb of a 3-step drop.

Let me tell you about a magically shitty place called Indiana, PA. It’s about an hour out past the Pittsburgh suburbs, and it truly combines everything that is shitty about both Pittsburgh and Indiana.

You’re not making me re-think this position.

And saying “tricked” is being charitable.

I knew of the sock thing, but also assumed it was more myth than practice. Regardless of the truth here, I will never ever use a laundromat to wash my personal clothes again.

Hey. Hey. Hey. Fuck you, Drew.

I get what you’re saying. If a dealer wants to make $4300 on a used car, what does it matter if that $4300 is included the advertised price or a bunch of fees they choose to tack onto an advertised price? At the end of the day, the only thing that matters is the price I’m paying for the car I’m buying.

I’m torn between using this opportunity to shit on Pittsburg, make some snide remark about disrespectful kids these days, and hating myself for getting old.

Futzing is not a swear word. That’s a good old-fashioned Pennsylvania Dutch-ism there.

I meant my parents mean well when they try to discuss music with me. Fuck Dolan with a basketball.

My parents went to see a show that they were opening, and when we talked about it after, my dad said “Those guys weren’t half bad.” They knew who it was.

I smirked and tried to softly voice my feelings on the matter. Bless their hearts. They mean well.

You’re not wrong. As heartbreaking as this is for that family, and as terrible as the situation is, future tragedies can be avoided in those two simple steps.

I think you’re pretty well on target with all of this stuff. I couldn’t see anything out of the ordinary with Dietrich’s positioning in the box. His feet are inside the lines, and he’s not leaning over into the strike zone. The pitchers need to grow up and fix their control issues. Or hit the bottom of the strike zone…

I’ll toss my hat in the ring. For a fraction of the price. I’ll be a Condi-style candidate. I may not know shit about high-level basketball operations, but I’m a people person who knows how to manage a team.

I know I’m a day late, but I came here to say this. Has to be the reason. The question to me is: was it at the guy’s damn locker room stall? Bent over right up against his batting practice jersey?

The Nets have spent the first four games of this series trying to catch the Celtics for biggest crybabies in the league. They were definitely getting the benefit of the doubt in general on foul calls throughout the game, and were terrible in transition D because they were too busy jawing at the refs to get back to the…

The only response I have is “because you shouldn’t be so fucking lazy as to need to prop your arms up on a supportive surface while you hold a 6oz cob of corn for the minute and a half it takes you to churn through that bad boy.”

So feel free to do with that what you will.

On the other hand, it could have more to do…

I turn the bathroom fan on every time precisely FOR the auditory privacy. Anywhere, any time. Nevermind my brown bombs. You don’t need to hear how long I was working on my beetus piss, either.