My IB English teacher got around that by having all her questions be quotes. You had to say who was speaking (or narrating), from what part of the story it was from, and the significance of the quote to the story as a whole. Ir was also open book. It was very easy to figure out who had or hadn't read the books, since…

"Can you not be such a pedantic nutcase?"

This kid has a glorious career in the intelligence community ahead of her.

As a lit professor, I just died a little.

I used to have teachers that do this. Wtf? I am ten and I need to pee. STFU.

Yes, people like this are amusing. Until you're relying on them to fix your car or remove your spleen or cook your chicken or do your taxes. There are very few times you can cut a corner where it won't make an appreciable difference.

Not everyone lurks on Reddit all day. Some of us lurk on Jezebel all day.

Psst. Teachers are on to you.

Voice: Hello, and welcome to the Springfield Police Department Resc-u-Fone. If you know the name of the felony being committed, press one. To choose from a list of felonies, press two. If you are being murdered or calling from a rotary phone, please stay on the line.

So...you're saying that the 39 year old millionaire wasn't the coolest guy at the rock festival?

I once heard you're supposed to hold the glass by the stem so your body heat doesn't warm up the wine too much... Not sure if it's true. my mum was pretty drunk when she told me.

If you're older than 22 and/or not built like a model, he'd be too confused by your body to do anything fun anyhow.

Cocaine. It does a body good.

After seeing that...I don't think I want to have sex with him anymore :(

I've cut family members out this way, too. "I work so much!"

THIS, 100 times this! Fuck "toxins", either name them or don't mention them, you alternative health fucks

TheWhiteBorpo, that is some sound advice.

"Sorry, my priorities changed, and you're not one of them."

It's also pretty fucking offensive to adults on the spectrum. "Oh, if only you had developed a crippling disease instead of being born how you were! We'd all be so much happier."

I'm so tired of arguing science with people that I just go and post this Roald Dahl quote now: