Jesus Christ. My ex missed the birth of our daughter because he was stuck in an airport in Ireland, en route from Afghanistan. That is a perfectly honorable and respectful reason to miss the birth of your child. Being absent due to service to the objectively worse US president, in terms of competency and pretty much…

@TrueFactsStated is the gateway drug.

Take solace: Russian Conspiracy Twitter relays sources from inside the NYAG, which is investigating That Asshole’s “modeling” agency (which included “discreet” escort services, ie prostitution for rich fucks). Alleged is the forging of documents to bring underage models from eastern Europe and Russia, and a whole…

If I just run out her time by flattering her this will be a cakewalk!

Maxine is 78. She has zero fucks left to give and she is not putting up with this shit.

It’s amazing they got as far as they have given how terrible and obvious their social skills are. It’s like a bunch of lizard people got together and tried to replicate human behavior and oh wait.

Thank you for your service! You’re doing god’s work.

HE can’t even dance, what are you talking about?

I always hide it behind crossword puzzles in every store I am in. I know that 2 of the cashiers that work at my local dollar store not only see me do it but never move shit back until the end of their shift unless the little turtle guy that owns the place comes in for the day.

I am 1000000000% here for couples getting divorced bc one partner supports Trump. He represents the worst of humanity so why would you want to be married to someone who supports that?

WHY ISN’T THERE ANYTHING ABOUT NORTH KOREA’S MISSILE LAUNCH???? IT WOULD FIT IN RIGHT BELOW THE THING ABOUT TOM CRUISE’S BREATH!!!!!!

Yeah, but Hillary’s emails....

Seasons In The Sun. Another horribly depressing song from 70's, this one about dying in a nursing home, written and performed by a another fellow Canadian.

Gordon Lightfoot is a damn fine songwriter.

Sometimes I think it’s a sin
When I feel like I’m winnin’ when I’m losin’ again. -Sundown

“Does anyone know where the love of God goes when the waves turn the minutes to hours?”

And...

Also Paulie is too stupid to understand a reference to a sinking ship probably isn’t going to go over well with Grump.

The highlight of my day now is poring over the Barf Bag “some tweets the President was allowed to publish” section to find what I like to call the daily “Code 45*”. You discover this coded message by finding all the words that earned an exclamation point in Trump’s daily Tweet pile. Sometimes the message comes out…

The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald is about a freak storm wrecking a ship and killing a bunch of working-class sailors. So, more like what the GOP was trying to do with healthcare.