This guy’s got the right idea.

The nation is soooo fortunate that the rest of that cliff is too unstable for additional faces.

That’s my guess! He already had the complaint ready to go, regardless of how Brown & Whaley responded. His base expects a certain response— so he’s giving it to them.

I think what’s more disconcerting is the staff. Like...seriously people? I can’t even fucking understand my own species anymore.

People keep saying Trump isn’t wanted in El Paso as if gun-worshipping Texans won’t line up to blow the guy. I have horrible news about who texans voted overwhelmingly for, guys! 

Anyway, Trump is off to El Paso, where things will likely be even worse.

He really can’t do a single thing without having to make it all about himself and/or take a shit on anyone when he sees the opportunity.

I’d guess he had a counter tweet already typed up on the narcissism fueled assumption that he’d be misrepresented by the lieberal media or whatever. But then that would require some forethought.

Someone on the previous article called it 100% correct, that he’d go and do his pointless visit, and try to appear “unifying”, and then take a total shit on it immediately thereafter through a rage tweet.

So, Sherrod Brown says Trump did a good thing and Trump says he’s lying about what happened?
I hate to say it, but I think Trump might be right here.

Well here it is, the most American headline of all time. 

And the horrible irony is the inventor of insulin and Nobel Prize winner Banting did not want anyone to profit from it!

If you’re looking for a serious relationship and not just some quick fun, maaaaaybe don’t use an app that forces you to choose people based on a staged photo and a corny one-liner bio?

So now the party of ‘pulling yourself up by your bootstraps’ won’t even let you put the boots on

So given that Stephen Miller’s creepy bald head is completely unemployable anywhere else, can we deport him because he’s entirely reliant on the federal government and therefore fails to achieve economic independence?

depressing and on point. 

This one’s too easy: Kevin is brown and his parents are detained for several days by immigration while trying to get back into the USA after they realize they’ve left him behind. Kevin’s afraid to go to the local authorities because duh, he’s a brown preteen. 

The key is to get full-battery charging times to under 15 minutes. When they can do that (it’s only a matter of time), then I’ll believe the ICE car’s death is truly imminent.

Investors will be spooked by the incoming tax hikes and policy changes that would directly affect their money if left in the market place.

But perhaps it’s best for some investors to leave the markets if the reason they are staying there is artificially low income tax on capital gains, etc.   Also, the tax hikes would presumably help cover the healthcare and education expenses that would increase.  Hell, we could also take some money that is…