I just downloaded it and it keeps trying to high five me for quickly scanning suggestions.

GHRRAHHHRRR!!!

Best pit I've ever been in was when I was at a hardcore festival in '94. When Strife played it was insane; piles of people falling on other piles of people. Best part? No bouncers at all the entire time.

I agree. Fuck Upworthy.

Nah. Basically a flying triangle choke resulting from a botched takedown attempt. Pretty rare.

This plus this?

Fingerpainting with Bulemia

"GOOD JOB, JENNY. Your quest to give every child lung-mumps is making great strides!"

Does the Kindle have an app that fights off hungry bears?

Hahaha, beat me to it! I was just getting Sumo Paint fired up to chop this one.

"You should check with the Rangers."

Less like Hollywood, and more like Spike and Mike.

I'd say the non-action is a way of not hitting and not screaming at the child but not having a response plan when they do get out of line. Unfortunately, when people decide not to use corporal discipline on their child there's a possibility that they don't then consider what to use in its place. I'm not advocating…

Needs more pelicans.

As a father of two, that gets to me.

"I know that feeling."

High fives all around.

I'm a parent and I think you probably understand better than those commenters.