I am perplexed by the blaring, abrasive rap music in Sweetgreen... I guess when the only options are healthy, it doesn’t matter.

Every time I order Chipotle online my order is wrong. 100% of the time.

Counterpoint: Sports don’t matter, who cares. Let her run.

The only reason it takes so long: opiate-induced constipation.

I see Taco Bell is getting the red carpet treatment it truly deserves...The undisputed king of cancer sludge food that I will never stop eating.

I hate carrying coins, but luckily there’s a vending machine every 100 feet.

So... Rock n Roll is dead?

I don’t think we should even need to go into why modern Billboard charts are completely meaningless fabrications and not indicative of how widely bought/consumed/enjoyed any piece of music is. Thanks IHeartRadio.

A Japanese group doing a 60s Motown tribute show in bad blackface... They definitely don’t understand the implications.

 Remake FF’s most beautiful game now.

I beg your pardon, that is the repurposed, lesser known Chicago-style THIN crust.

Nintendo Switch is not a video game console, it’s a Nintendo. (Or a ‘Tendo if you’re a cool kid.) It just happens to play video games. This is why you need both a Nintendo and a PC in order to play video games.

Listen to every appearance (30+ times) of Louis CK on the Opie and Anthony show and then tell me if any of these accusations surprise you.

...Or more vaporware to inflate its future IPO and to distract from current failures? You decide.

Kids playing All-Star Mario for the SNES

Buddy did you just pay $1,000 to get your ass beat by a bunch of cops? That’s a bad night.

RIP the power glove of the 2010s

He sure cornered the market of “Dumb Blond Boy Who’s Amazed By Everything”

SKIP INTRO! SKIP INTRO I SAID!!!! I have a nervous breakdown if it kicks in past the piano intro.

If you know the history of EarthBound fandom in the United States (starmen.net et al), you know it’s one of the greatest ironies in the history of Nintendo that the U.S. version of the SNES mini actually got Earthbound and the Japanese version didn’t. It’s a testament to the work of that U.S. fandom for the last 22…