Haka’d to death*

Ha ha. I was going to comment that he reminds me of this:

The people responsible for this, have been sacked.

you want to get to the bottom of this?

i honestly feel bad for anyone who has to order their pizza from any of these shit holes because of a lack of a local pizza place that don’t suck ass.

8 people were killed yesterday in a terrorist attack. 28 people are killed every day by drunk drivers. Today, yesterday, the day before that, every single day, day after day after day, 365 days a year, year after year after year. So where are all the news reports about the 28 people killed yesterday? Where is the…

On the other hand, more than 260,000 people have died violent deaths as the direct result of the Iraq War, which we launched in retaliation for 9/11.

So are we talking interdimensional warfare here, or not?

I think at this point it’s clear MacFarlane was warning us to train for the giant chickens that will soon come to fight us all.

I can’t speak to the legitimacy of the Bennett photo, but I do know this picture is real and it pisses me off. Really, though, we all kind of secretly knew.

This is vindication for Sammy Hagar fans everywhere.

To minimize your pain depending on your browser:

Also choose Democracy to build up your coffers, but when it’s time to rule the world you hard switch to Communism.

Being a petulant tyrant who sues for peace when things don’t work out but is otherwise an aggressive world-ender is the only way to play, as I understand it.

Ryan Mallett was refusing to hand over the Ravens playbook?

Honestly both.

Well I asked Alexa if this would be an issue for me and she said it was fine.

Because I’m a dick. Welcome to Deadspin for the first time.

Really it’s gonna be me with just shoes, a jersey, a hat, and a bat.