Try roundhouse kicking the Ferd Fteenthousand. I dare you.

I seem to recall facing a similar challenge in January. I considered all the options and still believe this is the best choice:

Well if I could build a damn car on VW's website I'd tell you

I bet you are too young to remember when they said that about Japan.

What're you driving these days?

I looked for "Tranny" and all I got were women with dicks.

As much as I dislike the Honda, it's a great truck. Drive like a car, has storage cubbies galore. It's great for someone that can only afford one car, only needs a bed to get a bunch of bags of mulch for the garden or to load up with camping gear, yet wants something nice to commute in. It can also fit five normal…

Bro Dozers. Big, loud, driven aggressively, rarely seen off asphalt, hard to get into. Pretty useless.

....but what if you need to pick up parts that you had overnighted from Japan?

Chevrolet SSR.

Because Rotaries are unreliable, gas chugging, oil burning paper weights?

Thats the face of someone who needs new pants...in a good way.

Oh come on. The Hyundai Genesis looks exactly like a generic Mercedes. It's so blatant.

Charging an electric car, 2014

Now, before I go any further, I should admit that some of our gas mileage issues may have related to my driving style. Since our stuff was so tightly packed in back, and thus there wasn't room for anything to roll around, I figured there was little chance something would break. So I did what any red-blooded American…

Dodge Challenger, the official car of telling the rest of the world to go fuck itself.

Hmmm.. too bad you haven't heard of the Suzuki Jimny

Pictured: not a tank