“I’m a reporter, not an accountant”

Oh, wow. Put down the shovel.

You’re not an accountant, nor are you his publicist/shill. If you’re not here to vet or contextualize, your job could be outsourced to a voice recording app and a typist.

I like what you’ve done there. (If Kate is the flibbertigibbet, greenlight right now.) 

Six days, seven nights re-boot! With Zach Efron in the Harrison Ford role and Selena Gomez in the part Anne Heche played!

Oh, shit. Wrong pitch meeting. My bad.

Can I punch Rumsfeld in the face?

Does Cheney have kickable balls?

(Obviously, W is a NPC stuck clipping into a wall.)

An honest Tyson documentary would be followed by folks deciding, “Why are we still fucking with this dude?”

I’m guessing this won’t be an issue here.

“Remedy #1, provided by the worst people imaginable...”

You went to 4chan about this?!

But still, “Damn scalpers!”

Live is dead, baby.

Good stuff, Ash. These pieces don’t always work on Kotaku. This one really did. Possibly because, wait for it, gaming wasn’t the solution.

Trïlogius Interruptus.

“(yeah I know, long sentence, breathe).”

That’s nothing, check out your next sentence...

“I pay literally hundreds of thousands of dollars in taxes.”

Easy there, T****.

“...narrow minded black-and-white world of yours.”

That’s cool and all. But since most of these improvements are aimed at those of us still waiting for it to be playable on our consoles, clearly (?) this isn’t aimed at folks who have already completed the game on PCs.

But, really. Cool and all.

“I posted this on twitter....”

I know you’re fielding a lot of questions, but I was curious of what significance is it you posted this on Twitter?

“This is the only reason why he was able to stay as long as he did: He was making people money...”

You’re saying he’s definitely the GOP nominee in 2036?

Racists are mostly white folks. The article is describing racism against black people. Again, your disingenuousness and fake outrage/hurt feeling are all obvious.

As a rule, you probably well understand that white people are rarely, if ever, are victims of actual racism. Or you’re super ignorant. (Possibly just a lazy…

Don’t project your disingenuousness onto me. What’s your issue with the use of words calling out white people for their racism? Is there a group of people for who racism is a bigger issue than white people? What is it you’re here to educate on/correct? 

Why does it bother you to see racist white folks called out? 

“*Sigh*”

Wow. This really affects you deeply, huh? That sigh feels like it came from the thinkiest part of your brain.