Dead.

Um, how about a freaking WIDE-OPEN crotch?

As a former high-school female cheerleader back in the 70's, I can confirm that splits are:

1. Something you need to work your muscles into over a period of time

My sister-in-law is visiting the United States (NYC) for the very first time, also the very first time she has ever even left her caribbean island nation. I’ve taken her to the usual NYC sights and also took her to the Met this week. Sweet young woman had never heard of ANY of the artists in the Impressionists wing…

I inherited my mother’s cat a few weeks ago. He eats like the world is coming to an end (yasss!) but has paws that make us look the other way.

Going to this screening tonight, followed by on-stage chats with Aubrey Plaza and Elizabeth Olsen. Times Talks totally rule if you are in town.

http://timestalks.com/detail-event.php?event=screentimes_ingrid_goes_west

A boob-roomba, if you will.

My two daughters always loved a good grilled cheese sandwich when they were little. It wasn’t until they were about 8 and 10, respectively, that I realized they thought I had been making them Girl Cheese sandwiches.

Like most dry cleaners in the city, the one on my block also offers excellent tailoring services and at a reasonable price - (Lucky’s Dry Cleaner, 520 E. 11th Street!). I haul all of my online mistakes to him to make things work. I’ve got excellent sewing skills but no time for that shit.

I wish Annie Lennox were my mom.

nevermind.......

I’m a fairly non-stupid white person - if I see a doctor of color, I figure she/he probably had to be twice as good to get half as far as the white doctor standing next to them so, bring it!

Just curious, do you carry a jar of peanut butter around with you when you are moving around NYC with your kids? #BodegaSnacksSaveTheDay

My husband used to chew up a bunch of peanuts into a crunchy paste and then pop it into our baby girl’s mouth. Gender equality in our house.

Do you think the Queen is mocking Trump’s hairdo with that hat?

I think the only thing she’s sculpting these days are her abs.

I’d just like to give you so many stars for the Kelly Bensimon reference.

More like“PRAW-puh.”

Use of the word “ghastly” is a dead giveaway.