Wait, are you saying that wasn't Willem Dafoe's actual penis?

You're a better man than me, @avclub-75e43c12ef9f1cfdaeae92ca6fa90640:disqus. My first thought after learning his real name was to ask myself if he's going to use this sabbatical to invent an Emergency Breakbeat Hologram.

You're a better man than me, @avclub-75e43c12ef9f1cfdaeae92ca6fa90640:disqus. My first thought after learning his real name was to ask myself if he's going to use this sabbatical to invent an Emergency Breakbeat Hologram.

I was kind of hoping it would be like Metal Gear Solid, and it turns out Bin Laden was a mystic who could create sand tornadoes with the power of his mind/nanomachines.

I was kind of hoping it would be like Metal Gear Solid, and it turns out Bin Laden was a mystic who could create sand tornadoes with the power of his mind/nanomachines.

I am growing increasingly convinced that an increasing number of movies are little more than the entertainment industry's equivalent of WPA-style make-work projects. There's no actual demand for these movies, but making them keeps a whole lot of people off the dole.

I am growing increasingly convinced that an increasing number of movies are little more than the entertainment industry's equivalent of WPA-style make-work projects. There's no actual demand for these movies, but making them keeps a whole lot of people off the dole.

Okay, @avclub-8288999e960ebe6aca280a2c31f5645b:disqus, @avclub-3ef00cbe8a65af09beddab1c55e103fd:disqus, I think we've transcended Schwarzeneggerisms here and are starting to get into Riddley Walker territory.

Okay, @avclub-8288999e960ebe6aca280a2c31f5645b:disqus, @avclub-3ef00cbe8a65af09beddab1c55e103fd:disqus, I think we've transcended Schwarzeneggerisms here and are starting to get into Riddley Walker territory.

You can tell when he has arisen when the wind begins to smell of apples.

You can tell when he has arisen when the wind begins to smell of apples.

You know, sometimes I look back at the history of gaming, and I think about the rivalry in the '90s between Blizzard and Westwood. One developer managed to transform their flagship RTS franchises into what became the biggest MMO on the planet and built its developer an empire. And the other…just kinda withered away…

You know, sometimes I look back at the history of gaming, and I think about the rivalry in the '90s between Blizzard and Westwood. One developer managed to transform their flagship RTS franchises into what became the biggest MMO on the planet and built its developer an empire. And the other…just kinda withered away…

That's not going to be good for anybody.

That's not going to be good for anybody.

"Wait a second, @avclub-e346d6f1bb5d611c2b6f81dae3046d20:disqus, let's back up to that Dawes biopic trilogy you were mentioning earlier…"

I'm Mike Wallace, I'm Morley Safer, and I'm Ed Bradley! All this and Andy Rooney tonight ON SIXTY MINUTES!!!!!

I'm Mike Wallace, I'm Morley Safer, and I'm Ed Bradley! All this and Andy Rooney tonight ON SIXTY MINUTES!!!!!

That's why I don't use the phrase "late capitalism". Once you learn that we've apparently been in a state of "late capitalism" since the 1920s, you really have to admit that the only person you're fooling is yourself.

In a similar vein, we need to get back to what the Olympics used to be about: determining whether Capitalism or Communism was the best system.