In theory if everyone thought like that, “safe” states would no longer be safe. I get what you’re saying, but it’s a slippery slope.

Leppo Marx was my all-time favorite, but often forgotten.

Johnson’s actually famous for going on national television and talking about how much he admires Obama as a leader. Only afterwards did he realize that as a ‘libertarian’, he’s not supposed to say that. Google it. Apparently after that gaffe he decided it’s better to just not know or think anything that has to do with…

Running for president isn’t a barroom trivia contest. That said, I expect political candidates to at least have a grasp of global issues. Johnson is incompetent and Stein is a looney tune and that’s why this Green is voting Clinton. It wouldn’t matter if I voted for Vermin Supreme in my state, but I feel she’s the…

Weld gave him the answer he was looking for in the old Nancy-voicing-marionette-Ronnie tradition. (Their answer was Vicente Fox)

Did someone say, “rando dipshit former governor who hoped to swindle some sweet donor cash and get a small Q rating bum...?”

This the guy many Bernie supporters are leaning towards now? He is basically the inverse-Bernie.

I think, while we may have a variety of opinions regarding the legalization and use of marijuana, we can all agree it’s a really poor decision to be HIGH AS BALLS WHILE CAMPAIGNING.

I assume Weld just rolled his eyes, threw his hands up and said, “Jesus, what the fuck am I doing?” and walked off the stage.

“Hmm, well.....I know that Assad is a town in Syria.”

I couldn’t tell you my neighbor’s name either.

Chris Matthews: I bet you can’t name one foreign leader you admire.

“Umm, Two Leppos?”

Well, this is what happens when you’re a rando dipshit former governor who hoped to swindle some sweet donor cash and get a small Q rating bump and ended up trapped in an election between two supremely unlikable “real” candidates.

This guy was governor of a state that borders Mexico.

My freshman roommate left red solo cups full of chewing tobacco spit all over the room, told me never to bring my “n****rs friends into this room ever again,” joked about being a member of the KKK, put Nair into my Pert Plus bottle because he didn’t like my Mohawk, and stole my AD/DC cd.

Netflix and vibrators:

My senior year I decided to get random roommates, because my friends lived a short walk away and, up to this point, I didn’t have people that were abjectly terrible people. So, I end up with three random kids - 2 juniors and 1 senior.

My second college roommate (out of 3) cried one night and told me he wanted me to be his best friend because he never had one before. I moved out later that week. He was also a super-duper lightweight and made a embarrassment of himself every time he got high or drunk.

Not really juicy enough to merit an email but: