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All of these cars with the exception of the Lexus, Avalon and Transit would have their owner making roughly minimum wage driving for Uber or Lyft without even factoring in maintenance costs.

I mean, he did link to an ad for exactly such a car...

I swear, that line was half the reason I submitted it.

Do you drive a P71, too ?

I take a few deep breaths and remind myself I am a rational human being and not this person:

I dunno, I still vote this #1

2017 VW Golf SportWagen 4MOTION would like to chat with you sir.

Best new car this year ?

....AND WHAT I HAVE IS A 1971 PORSCHE THAT LOOKS LIKE IT MATED WITH A 1995 PORSCHE A TVR AND GENE SIMMONS WARDROBE.

If you don’t read the ad, you will miss this zinger:

This car is like the New Jersey of Porsches. It tries to be flashy in all the wrong places, and ultimately you just want to get out of it as soon as possible before realizing you’ve made a terrible mistake.

The Nice Guys had great cars! How cool is cruising L.A. at night in a drop top Mercedes with a giant bumble bee?

I swear I heard “No, nonononnnnooo. You boys can’t do this to me. I wanted one years ago before they had i-drive!”

Goodbye Chris. Nobody will ever miss you. You useless, obnoxious, ginger, talent-vacuum fucknugget.

Well, wearing a turtleneck shirt and trendy glasses works better with a SAAB.

You’re the first reply that’s given a real answer to this challenge. Uber drivers need an ultra reliable car (no $$ on maintenance) that has a big back seat and a big trunk and gets great gas mileage.

This is a solid answer.

ANYTHING?

I’m sorry but seriously, fuck them. The new Frontier diesel has been successful but it’s craftsmenship is satisfactory. I want a Toyota diesel.