When I used to work at a grocery store, the register rang up Land O’Lakes Buttermilk as “LOL BUTT MILK” which is only tangentially related to this but I found it 10000% hilarious.

And magnesia, apparently.

LAHT-keh:

The hat in my picture actually says “Wizzard” on it if you could blow up the image big enough.

I will star any and all Terry Pratchett-related comments.

Ok, assuming you’re not kidding here (because there are serious comments like this every week and you’ve done nothing too over the top to show you’re being sarcastic) a person who keeps Kosher or Halal would know what “pork” means because it would be incredibly important for them to know that. If your diet forbids you…

She proceeds to explain to him that only a hamburger contains meat, and that a cheeseburger is vegetarian. She says she knows this because she has been to McDonald’s in London literally *hundreds* of times in the last few years, and that a cheeseburger is always vegetarian when she orders one!

“What’s homo milk? Is this milk from GAY COWS?!” he demands, utterly* seriously, even angrily.

And for my salad, I'll have a bowl of croutons.

The ingenious waitress’ name has been lost to history, but the Legend of The Waitress With The World’s Driest Sense Of Humor is still whispered to this very day.

The Reuben one reminded me of a story Terry Pratchett told. He said that one jet-lagged evening he accidently asked for Three Mile Island dressing for his salad. The waitress didn’t say a word, just brought him Thousand Island dressing and a bottle of hot sauce.

“I want a Greek Platter but I don’t do olives, I don’t do hummus, I don’t do cheese and bread hurts my stomach.”

I just know that at some point before I die I'm going to see a package of hamburger with a warning label "Contains meat." and it's going to be because of one of these idiots.

In the city I live in, there are gay bars, some of which I’ve been to with friends. I don’t complain that they call it a “gay bar”.

I don’t believe your story happened the way you say it did, but if it did, I don’t see what relevance it has. Is your argument “gay people were assholes this one time so we shouldn’t care if anyone is an asshole”? There’s nothing wrong with calling assholes assholes. Yeah, I couldn’t care less how much negative…

Just to be clear, by ‘Devil’s Advocate’ you really mean ‘Homophobe Apologist’, right?

Also this one (in case anyone hasn’t already seen em floating around)

And then there is this, my second-favourite picture of all time. A picture of such sublime, ecstatic absurdity that it really ought to be hanging in the National Portrait Gallery for future generations of Britons to appreciate and revere. I love it so.

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