Hey, has anyone made a joke yet about how they would have liked to be one of those rocks? Oh…never mind, then.

Funny how the right content can turn the interior of the Nostromo into a Glamour Shots studio.

It might give me a little nudge, since truth is usually stranger than fiction. Purely fictional films tend to get a little heavy on cliche, conventional character arcs, and predictable plot points, but reality doesn't really ever follow those rules.

I'll go Gruber, too, though Skynet is a formidable foe. Gruber's awfully fun to watch, and much more prone to human cruelty (Schiess dem Fenster!). The Terminator's more unstoppable, but Gruber indulges in his work: “The exactness, the attention to every conceivable detail, it’s beautiful.” How delightfully German!

Though the imaginary baby wasn't as bad as the very real bear. First bear I ever saw where there weren't bars are a moat between me and it, and 30 minutes later I'm lost in the woods. More bad thoughts…

That's exactly the way I feel about it: interesting, but not good. The idea of quasi-human beings from another dimension that value quantity of sensation over quality is a bizarre and frightening concept, especially for any quality-over-quantity humans that are unfortunate enough to be subjected to their particular…

I'd be scared too if my dad always said "WHAT IN THE HELL ARE YOU DOING IN THE BATHROOM DAY AND NIGHT?!? WHY DON'T YOU GET OUT OF THERE, GIVE SOMEONE ELSE A CHANCE?!?"

Same thing happened to me one afternoon while visiting Sequoia National Park. Tried to take a snowed-over shortcut back to the parking lot but lost the trail. Then it started snowing over my tracks…and everything looked the same in every direction. And going the wrong direction would just lead me deeper into the…

Yeah, I liked how the second one got a little deeper into the mythology, but it still gave me no reason to want to even attempt the third.

Yep. Friday the 13th and Halloween never did anything to me like the original Texas Chainsaw. Even the original Nightmare on Elm Street, weird as it is and great in its own right, never even touched the meat hook scene.

Not to mention, just getting lost in the woods is scary enough if you're not prepared for more than just an overnight stay. Add something that likes to screw with your head for a few days before getting your friends to kill you, and it's downright terrifying.

That trailer for Hellraiser fascinated and scared the bejesus out of me when I was a kid. Years later, the film was something of a letdown, though the idea of being swept away to the pain dimension is still horrifying. I would not object to Hellraiser getting remade by someone good.

"I'm Weird A.I. Yankovic, and this is my new hit single, 'Let's Get Digital!'"

I'm having I'll Be Mellow When I'm Dead played at my funeral.

It's compelling, but I still have my doubts. There are way to many holes in that narrative. Like what is Trump supposed to get out of making a national buffoon of himself and destroying the brand he has worked decades to cultivate? What's the rationale for assuming that a loudmouthed asshole is going to be charming…

Actually, he did run in 2000 and has flirted with the idea a number of other times. He just never got very far.

It's crossed my mind more than once, though it does leave the question unanswered of how the Democrats were able to guarantee that he would get the nomination, given that he's run and not even come close several times in the past.

Memba' Ghostbusters?

Dude, what's with the medieval chainmail? I know it's supposed to be a hoodie, but he looks less like he's about to rock and more like he's about to go fight with Joan of Arc.

So a series based off a movie that made its name by sucking ends up sucking? Incredible.