Step 1: Restart your franchise by allowing Spider-Man to commingle with the MCU.
Step 2: After achieving massive success, cut ties with the MCU and go it alone but with the same actor and director.
Step 3: ???
Step 4: Re-tell the story of Spider-Man’s origin/Uncle Ben’s death.

I’m honestly stumped as to what could…

I like to think that Uncle Ben and Thomas and Martha Wayne are all hugged up in a therapy group somewhere together.

Ummm, being a loner doesn’t mean someone can’t have friends. We see Peter with his classmates in the current version, but the only person he hangs out with is Ned. Also, yeah it makes sense that he graduated three years after he was introduced. Comics were generally in real-time then. You can’t put the same time…

Yep. They are. For reasons. 

So his whole definitive origin being a high school student never happened?

I think you’re intentionally exaggerating but Ditko was plotting the stories tightly as his run went on. Nothing random about it. Then Stan added the memorable dialogue with a lot of the characterization.

MerylStreepCateBlanchettMargotRobbieEmmaStoneScarlettJohanssenMargoMartindaleLassie..... Are just some with a more engaging presence. I'll say that Dunst seems friendly

Eh, I’d barely put 2 at TERRIFIC these days. Obviously we won’t even talk about 3. Maguire, everyone really, were just physically too old looking and they never captured the feel of innocence versus a sense of justice that the MCU version did. 

Come on, they already have the solution. Tom Holland is Night Monkey!

I really like ‘Spider-Man 2' - for a while it was my favourite superhero film - but I still agree with you. I think Raimi winks at the audience to much, and with the exception of Doc Ock I think he struggles to know what to with his villains. Green Goblin’s plan was to ... blow shit up in New York? Sandman just wants…

We all lose when Sony makes bad Spider Man movies. And they will... once or twice, until they get the point.

Couldn’t they have lost in something I don’t care about, like Star Wars or Avatar? (Hot take: I’m more interested in the Avatar sequels cuz of Cameron’s good sequel track record than I am in Star Wars)

Don’t blame me, I waited for home release and then pirated it :)

Spider-Verse was a critical success, not box office however.  

“Spider-verse even one a fucking Oscar!”

Again, Sony thinks they can build their own expansive Cinematic Universe because they own the rights to hundreds of characters, forgetting that like 95% of those are only notable because sometimes they talk to Spider-Man.

You guys able to put a five-a-side team together yet?

Like any good person I don’t want Disney to win every time, but this isn’t good. The Marvel Spiderman movies were good, the Sony Spiderman movies were bad. Seems dumb to celebrate more of the latter and fewer of the former, even if it does stick it to Disney. 

welp, everyone loses in this scenario, so I hope the execs at SONY are happy.