I realized the other day that parenthood is really just a test of how much of another person’s bodily fluids you can stand to be covered in and for how long. The other day, I found a smear of poop on the outside edge of my hand about an hour after I had last changed a diaper. Now in my pre-mom life, finding someone…

Take the money, split it with the Good Sister and figure out how much you can get for your firstborn. Or at least how much you can get to name Bad Sister the godmother. Buy a spinning wheel.

Dude, if I were the poor sister I would tell bride sister to absolutely take rich sister’s money. Then we could split the cash to go do something awesome just the two of us. And if we’re feeling bitchy we could plaster pics all over Facebook of our great time together. We could even tag mean sister like, “Without Mary…

And if these books are giving women a tingle, they should check out their aunt’s collection of grocery store porn lit - you know, the ones with Fabio types on the cover. I’d say the level of writing is about the same. When I was young my family rented a cottage and I perused their book collection and WHOA did I learn…

No dong. Can’t be bothered.

My favorite part is the whole “Its fine for me to talk to you this way, but rather than matching my tone you definitely should have been much nicer to me than I was to you so basically the fact that I was a bitch is your fault.” I bet she’s a ton of fun!

The original emailer is in for some rough times! It’s clear she thought she’d get two pushovers or people who didn’t like confrontation. I hope she’s prepared for a long year.

This is the best email conversation. Almost as good as the unhinged sorority emails from two years ago (but not really, those will always be THE ALL TIME BEST).

You just reminded me that this Vogue article/issue does not matter (to me anyway).

Should have been the September cover.

The lording of lighter skin is a common thing growing up in Nairobi. Being called ‘black mamba.’ The slow burn of recognizing something else is better than you.

is there another kim kardashian that i dont know about

She is the one who has been pushing for it so hard: ‘Daddy, daddy we have to do this.’ She’s very smart, and she’s right,” he said earlier Tuesday while in Iowa.

Drake’s “ranch-style home has five bedrooms and a guest room

Maybe, and let me just throw this CRAZY idea out there, he wanted to date someone he liked.

I’m still just so puzzled by the entire T-Swiz/Hiddleston thing. I went from “Huh. I wouldn’t have pegged him as fame thirsty but I guess I was wrong” to now just straight up wondering what his agenda was. Because whatever it was, this relationship definitely didn’t further it.

Well, Hillary overheated on a hot day at a crowded event, and that is way more relevant than the fact that Trump lies about literally everything.

I was at work. News kept trickling to us through customers and coworkers. When someone told me a plane had crashed into the World Trade Center, I thought they meant a little Cessna or something similar. I thought it was a terrible accident. We had a little TV in the breakroom, but its screen was broken and it just had…

I would like to take a moment to pay tribute to my father, Marine Corp Colonel Samuel Tillett for his courageous and near fatal actions, attempting to save as many lives as possible 15 years ago today in his position as head of security at The Pentagon. When the plane hit my father was not but a hundred feet from the…

That was my first thought! Of course she's hot, she's wearing Level II armor under her jacket