How much you wanna bet I can throw a football over them mountains?

Perhaps my favorite thing about the Donald is his look every time he gives an interview. That default scowl is absolutely hilarious.

The best part about this season is the titles that each person gets. Like, Jubilee is “Veteran,” and the twins are “twin.”

I cannot understand why people do not lock their doors.

Yeah all men are evil.

This is a nightmare.

I dated a girl in college that wouldn’t leave me alone after we broke up. I understand that you are afraid of what your ex was capable of, but it’s not just a problem that women face.

Anytime Ohio State plays Michigan, I root for both teams to somehow lose. Never happens...

Wait, I thought he was still injured...

Why is anyone surprised? Coaches still run the same offenses and defenses that were being run 30 years ago, and they ALL do it. Plus their staffs are made up of their kids, their best friends, and former players. The NFL doesn’t evolve without someone kicking down the door.

Wow Chris Long got aggressively Southern.

Antonio Cromartie, the Ghengis Khan of our time and space.

I WAS THINKING THE SAME THING

That kid sucked at the draft, and he sucks now.

I started a dynasty with Harvard and ran the Wing-T.

You think the Roethlesberger camp will ever use the combination of his long, physical football career and that one time he rode his motorcycle into a wall as some sort of excuse for his behavior? I imagine it’s only a matter of time...

I eat while I take lunch because my commute is hell, and I want to get out ASAP.

Well, it IS his fault that the young woman was gang raped...or not.

Because she’s a pop star who with an enormous sense of entitlement (not unlike Leo)?

You know what would work better than a gun (against an intruder)? A baseball bat, or a golf club, or maybe a machete. HOT TAKE!