Exhibit A

You laugh at your own jokes, don’t you?

It implied you can’t differentiate between Lea Michelle and Alyssa Milano.

I mean I know she’s annoying as hell, but why drag Lea Michelle into this?

So my theory that any unattached men in their mid-to-late thirties are screwed up is both correct and confirms that I am avoidant? This is a cheerful way to start Tuesday. 

You mean like the heart of Capitol Hill which sits firmly in SE and where crappy row houses go for well over a million dollars? Or over by the Armory where you can get a row house for a steal at like $600,000? The “SE you’re all referring to” has been disappearing for years. There is plenty of money in every quadrant…

A lot...because the world is still full of people afraid to step foot in SE DC because they still think they are going to get stabbed and dragged into a crack house the minute they step off the Metro.

Have any of you been to Southeast DC lately? May I interest you in a 1 bed, 1 bath 700 sq. ft. condo for half a million dollars?

Of course, people from all over travel obscene distances to attend the World Series, but it was still a game being held in a city that gave Trump a whopping 4.1% of their vote. He was not going to be well received. Hence why the owners begging the MLB not to be put in the position of having to say no to Trump if he…

I realize that Trump is the poster boy for the Dunning Kruger Effect, so yes, he probably did think that he would get a rousing ovation - hell, he probably thought the bullpen was going to call and ask him to come pitchy a couple innings - but is everyone else around him so brainwashed they honestly weren’t expecting…

Sorry, who am I kidding, they wouldn’t be visiting their kids. What was I thinking. 

Not to sound all “after the fact preachy” - but perhaps if these parents had spent just a little more making sure their kids were actually doing their homework, or you know, knew how to properly write the alphabet, they’d be visiting their kids for family weekend at a perfectly acceptable 2nd tier university instead…

Gotta keep up with Cardi.

This plays directly into the idea that a person can’t be too things at once. I can get goosebumps when Captain America says “Avengers. Assemble” and still appreciate Scorsese. Guess what - the world is pretty fucking awful at the moment, so if I want to spend a couple hours of my time knowing the good guys are going…

She goes on and on and on about how being queer is such a huge part of her identity, how it was SO WEIRD being in a heterosexual marriage as a queer woman, yet, has she actually ever been in a relationship with a woman minus the publicity stunt she pulled after her divorce?

Actually, Bernie lost; she won the nomination and the popular vote.

I didn’t mention any racist surrogates - I said he needed to address his own problematic history.

If we are going to demand Elizabeth Warren address problematic surrogates then we sure as hell better deman Bernie address his own problematic history when it comes to race. 

Here’s another take: NO ONE should go to PRISON for lying to get a kid into school. The mother to lied about her address should get the assistance she needs and the other lady should be forced to pay the full tuition of a true first generation college student for a full four years at the institution she scammed her…

“I mean this ONE time, seriously, ONCE, I gave this girl a pill and she kinda passed out and then I stuck my dick in her, but only for like, a couple seconds - like it wasn’t a big deal, but now I think people are like, judging me which really isn’t fair, so, can you make the post-it girl go away?” END SCENE.