If a man is aways going out of his way to prove how brilliant he is- or if it’s being proven at someone else expense- he is BAD NEWS BEARS.

Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner got drunk one night and murdered someone for sport.

“He’s still the only person who really knows the truth about things. And I’m still the only person that knows some of his truths.”

The way she described Ben reminds me of many women’s relationship with narcissistic men (I know that n word is thrown around a lot, but I think it’s an epidemic in this culture.) Reaaaally trying to avoid ever being with anyone who is Brilliant And Generous And Charismatic but makes me feel small. Big people should…

I’ve never had much of an opinion on Jennifer Garner one way or the other, but damn if this doesn’t make me like her. “I refuse to be the ashes”? Sweet fancy Moses on a hot buttered biscuit, that is awesome!

Can’t find a flaw in that.

She dropped “Bless his heart.”

If he's willing to close bridges & have people die in ambulances as a result I'd imagine he'd be game for anything. Except not be an asshole of course.

Newsflash - none of these bullsh!t “Emergency Managers” had a f*cking clue.

Bottomline - the state couldn’t afford all the corporate welfare & taxcuts for the rich - *just like the country as a whole*.

#downsizeyourfuckingyacht

Reminds me of a fair or something I went to years ago where someone had a sign that read: Free Ice Cold Beer When You Buy a Rock.

Sure, if you enjoy hot dogs made with the flesh of men she’s lured off the street with promises of free topless lap dances.

‘Murican dream if you ask me.

John Waters is casting her biopic at this very moment.

Wow, I guess Edna Krabappel was right. You’re either a Supreme Court Justice, or a sleazy stripper.

“all Scalia wants is to live out her remaining years giving lap dances and selling her hot dogs”

sounds kinda noble

Rehab for what? Her love of hotdogs? Hot dog rehab?

It is crazy. When my husband does something sweet or it is our anniversary, I tell him in person rather than posting it on Facebook.

I'm not on facebook but my bf is and is really careful about pics, he pretty much uses it for work. A friend of a friend said it was "shady" that no pics of me are there. I had a stalker and am too scared to put any pics of me out there. So I shrugged and said it was no biggie. She was shocked I wasn't hurt or…

The people who brag the most about how #blessed they are are the most insecure in general, not just in relationships, right? It's the whole "lady doth protest too much" thing.