I accidentally bought a roto-triller once. Within a few months of using it, I had an entire orchard full of sizzurp trees.

Dan Snyder Claims 17 Years Old is Too Old

Adam Silver is merely following David Stern's lead in attempting to eliminate any sort of hip hop influence in basketball.

What's funny is that if we were talking about a bridge rather than a football player, everyone would be ecstatic about an upheld suspension.

"Gee Mr. Rose, I was wondering if you could tell me about how you got to third base on Bob Gibson last year in St. Louis."

<Charlie Weis examines chart>

Talk about defamation of character, they made him look just like a criminal!

I have no idea why he would lie about saving his nephew considering he actually sprained his ankles while slipping on the floor of the soup kitchen he was mopping up after having served dinner to about 300 needy people.

Anonymous Sources Report Incognito Team Remains Unidentified

Phil, a life long truth-in-advertising consumer advocate, is desperately attempting to restore the 'hospital' to 'hospitality'. "A golf ball from 300 yards is sure to raise a welt, as well as awareness. The simple act of applying ice from someone's 7 and 7 to the injury can help to change the tide back to a time when…

It's called standing up for what you believe in, which I can understand would be a foreign concept to the pussies on this site. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to put on my blackface for the minstrel show I'm performing at halftime.

If you were to make this confession to a priest he would say, "God doesn't give shit, now get out of the booth."

I've seen better wet t-shirt contests in the nursing home my grandparents live in.

You're the best Greg!

Great point, thank you. I no longer consider this an exciting baseball play, I can only see a flagrant disregard for the rules.

Why should I consider what Urban Meyer has to say? What in the world does he know about football? Rather, I will just assume the position of this writer who proves their own assertions by claiming that Meyer is delusional and his synapses are misfiring. And how does this writer make such a diagnosis? By basing it on…

When Lou Dobbs was informed that the name of the capitol of Burkina Faso was not pronounced "Ooga Booga" he replied by saying he was actually referring to the 'African language'.

If I cry you a river, will you promise to get into a head on collision?

Reading that title about boning steroid poster boys brings back fond memories of my last vacation to West Hollywood.

It's a lot like Ray Guy's situation in the NFL. Thankfully he finally got in, hopefully Edgar gets in as well. As the old adage goes, "Sportwriters are the biggest fucking idiots ever."