The actor in that ad is called Rogerio Cardoso (1937-2003). He was a very famous and talented humorist. He's sorely missed, but you just gave me a good reason to check his old gags on youtube! :)

(brazilian portuguese) https://pt.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rog%C3%A9…

Let me know if you need more info about the ad, but it is…

I love ya. Mwah!

Ohm dang it. I was too fast and missed the "fastest *US* goal ..." part, sorry!
Anyway, for curiosity sakes, the fastest ever was 10.89 seconds, Hakan Şükür ( Turkey, vs Korea Republic, 29 June 2002, 2002).
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/FIFA_Worl…

Ah, an orlove'd picture.