Sometimes I feel like Americans are vapid consumers of shit that doesn't make sense. Then I remember the middle east exists, and I don't feel so bad.

Seems like it’s only me, but I’m not very enthusiastic about this car.

But not soothing?

I almost tossed my hat in the ring, but you lost me completely at $12.50 per hour. A shame really, as this would be fun.

Welcome to our show— hold on, I gotta finish this blowjob.

What in the hell are you talking about?

"Instructions unclear. Penis stuck in induction coil."