I scream

Wait, the Walmart near my house has the deodorant locked up but this one just has fireworks laying out there for anyone with a lighter to mess with?

The greatest baseball prank is still Rick Manning having sex with Dennis Eckersley’s wife.

2016 America: Where a 12-year old boy is shot and killed by the police for playing with a toy and it’s his fault because he should have “known” that people would see him as a threat, while a full-grown adult who rapes an unconscious woman and tries to flee should only have to endure a couple months of jail because…

LeBron James wears 23

”Way too young.”

Years ago me and a buddy smuggled ALOT of Valium back from Mexico which started a six month period that I cannot remember clearly considering I was also drinking a 12 pack a night. One night sticks in my memory: I was high as a kite on pills and Jack and decided to heat up some leftover Dominos so I put the oven on…

Brooklyn? Probably is a gluten free crust with shit like basil on it. I”ll take a Digiorno over it any time. Everybody will think it’s delivery anyways. They NEVER believe me!

I wanna hang out backstage and light batteries on fire with Ludacris

(Lacob’s fiancé, also in attendance, would later play the part of charming peacemaker with the Thunder fan heading into Game 4)

Bet a DH doesn’t get hit in the face with this pitch.

We really need to start an aggressive campaign to get any and all discussion of salad out of Deadspin. The fact that you had it as a BBQ side was bad enough.

Steve Kerr should've stepped in bounds and stolen the ball from Westbrook and let the refs sort it out later

Huh. I don't think the Madden Curse has claimed anyone via STD yet, so that's cool.

Atlanta Braves closer has to be pretty high on the list.

I’m sorry.

Can you blame him? Imagine sitting next to someone who is constantly cheering for Matthew Della-Della-Della-Dellavedova.

Yo, dawg. I heard you like breakfast...

@cmdrfire: Much easier to read a headline and then post a comment than read the whole post. Who reads anymore anyway, that's pre-9/11 stuff.