Caps lock = /s when i read things

But what if Motte owns a Harley?

Movie dates are awful and they both deserve this

All the guns will be replaced with walkie talkies by the 6pm news.

If it was the Jimmy Johns guy, the shark would be slathered with a gooey white substance alleged to be mayonaise.

They’re athletes. Be thankful they understand suffixes

Every Bengals fan already knows this. Mike Brown combines the shameless moneygrabbing of Dan Snyder with the brutal organizational efficiency of the Rooneys in Pittsburgh.

Watching Donovan do the same rotations every game was maddening. You’re going to lose anyway, might as well try out some new shit just in case something clicks.

Hugo <3

People over the age of 4 making more noise than a baby on an airplane makes me question everything about this story

Right field is easily the shittiest position in baseball (Maybe 3rd also but im LH) with the weird spin off the bat and maybe seeing the ball 3 or 4 times a game. Left has a lot more action, but it’s the noodle arm spot.

Does she know you get to drive carts?

The sweatshop worker that made my shoes sure earned the 50 cents he/she made that day. 4 years and counting!

US bank is awful. Im 6' and the seats make you feel like Yao Ming flying coach

...And once again second fiddle to NY

They don’t get much more straightforward than that. The refereeing was awful all game and not just against Bayern (but they got the worse end).

Oh for fuck’s sake

Holy shit, he basically took a goddamn car to the face.

Ronaldo (probably):Why is it rape only when someone cries after I score?

Just in case one of the eggs do get fertilized.