Continuing with the theme of “NO SERIOUSLY YOU’VE COMPLETELY MISSED THE POINT OF ALL OF THIS”...

Good, interesting protagonists for their stories...

Not the heroes.

Pro Tip for the first guy:

To be specific, I have always grown up idolising the “Ramona Flowers” type manic pixie dream girl.

I told you she was no good for you!!

Mom?

I thought the appropriate way was to have the dumpling grow up, resent you, and start dating a white girl, then you eat the entire dumpling in one bite.

This method is EXACTLY what I wrote. 

“You’ll never guess my name, or my name isn’t Rumpelstiltskin!”

Of course he is. This is Hollywood after all. 

Rumpelstiltskin’s main moral is: DON’T SING A SONG DETAILING YOUR SECRET NAME. Talk about a bad and diabolus ex machina-laden plot.

well, people are bitching about a she-ra reboot...

Precisely. It rode the anime wave pretty hard, and the Teen Titans cast targets that hot topic demographic. Throw in “muh childhood” and you have the recipe for angry fanboys who take this shit way too seriously.

Not only is it not a sequel to the 2003 Teen Titans show, but it actively rubs it in the fans face at every opportunity. Like, there is seriously an episode where they take an episode from the original TT series and dub it over.

Ugh, have you seen the manbabies whining about She-Ra’s reboot?

Have you heard about the recent Thundercats and She-Ra reboots?  There’s a loooot of the same thing happening, and those shows aren’t even out yet!

Oh no, there are plenty of people who hate it on its own merits, ask any youtube comment section. The main problem stems from the fact that it’s not the ‘03 series. And in the interest of being fair, that show did end its last episode on a cliffhanger of sorts, and it did have a bunch of serious plot episodes. But a…

Counterpoint: I’m a non-Magic player, and I’m well-aware that Black Lotus is one of the rarest cards in the game.

Totally! I mean fuck black people for trying to capitalize on their IP... Who do they think they are, white men?

My Toad will always be a street musician from an oppressed socioeconomic class sticking it to The Man with his lame protest songs.