There's a Detroit-style pizza up the street; I hope they don't close because if there is anything better than pizza it is pizza the thickness of a goddam lasagna.

Fucking right. 

I said it in the thread about cream and my thought applies here as well: the bar for what constitutes "a problem" has been set so low that I am confident that humanity will end because we grabbed the kitchen tweezers with the wrong hand.

They even make spreadable cream cheese so you can easily put it on whatever. Or, you can let regular cream cheese soften for ten minutes so it also spreads. Honestly, the bar for what qualifies as “a problem” nowadays is pathetically low. I am confident that humanity will be wiped out by thumb soreness from playing…

at that age i’d have a hard time looking up from popcorn and soda party too. lookit that kid smilez when he sees the ballie eh?

fucken right buy @deadspin a beer every time is see em for fucken ever bahd

When Ms. Press is giving her reply, she looks like she is thinking “And right after this presser I am going over to that office and introduce their sorry asses to my World Cup winning foot”.

Picture him rollin'.

Only in America do the mascots try to beat children.

You, your acrobat/slave, and your rum made from tiger penis and polluted air can get lost, China.

I'm sorry, but "Star War's"?

Let's indeed!

I notice that regularly (Chrysler, I am looking at you) and figure that the materials are just way cheaper than the vehicle and that the rear gets a bit more exposure. We had an ‘84 Toyota Tercel wagon (great car otherwise) growing up and that wiper arm disintegrated before the car even got dusty.

Please move the IndyCars to Mosport. God knows how much I adore the sounds of the racing heard through downtown over the weekend but it would be great if there were more than one place to overtake another car. And Mosport is a beeyouteeful venue.

The bun looks nicer but not a fan of that mayo-lookin' goo.

Okay. I don't get the revulsion but okay.

If it is not a burger, do not answer the folloing question.

What’s an "Arch Deluxe"?

I highly doubt that you are indeed

This is off-topic but for a comedian, Whoopi often seems to have a tough time spitting out sentences.