0) There is a game

The Laws of Thermodynamics:

He does love Fig Newtons

Even Icelandic immigration can be - odd.

So back in college, I went to a beer pong tournament and got paired up with quite an attractive teammate. As the tournament went on, we became more and more friendly and after a tough loss we ended up commiserating back in her dorm room. As I had many beers that night, I had quite the singular focus once we arrived…

In college I met some kid who had won GUTS when he was younger and had a piece of the Aggro Crag in his frat house room. It was amazing. And I was so jealous

Winners of GUTS got a piece of the Aggro Crag! It’s the radical rock!!!!!

Depends. If you’ve been around long enough you’ve seen the photo of Deadspin with Colin Kaepernik. Please note Drew’s sweater around his waist.

Winning “Double Dare” or “GUTS” would have been the tops, I’d have been rolling in some fuckin’ sweet LA Gear shoes for the duration of my adolescence (which, coincidentally would have made me a little shit)

Keep in mind this is the same guy that pulled a belly landing on Star Killer Base in the MF. #scruffylooking

I saw Star Wars Ep 2 in the theater, and at one point Anakin says to Padme, “Are you suffering as much as I am?” Some national treasure yelled out “Yes!” and the entire theater burst out laughing. It was cinematic perfection.

1. Al. Al? AL! Do you really think Mentos are gum?

Ahh yes, I have a lifelong love for these.

Fly, yes. Land, no.

The hero America needs, not the one we deserve

In case anyone was wondering about the Spanish being spoken, he’s saying:

I suppose that you could call it the jump of the century.

Um, can I get one restored by Toyota instead?

It’s got a commie motor, commie shocks, and commie tires. It was built before shits were given so it will never run good. So is it the new Red mobile?

Well look at the man with the golden fuckin’ sphincter over here guys.