I think we should all go ahead and scream “Thanks for curing cancer!!!!!!!” whenever we see Jaleel White, though

Wow.

My favorite story like this is the old guy from the She Blinded Me With Science video who basically got PTSD and became a shut-in because he couldn’t go anywhere without people screaming “SCIENCE!!!!!!!!” at him in the streets. I don’t know why that makes me laugh so hard. It’s quite sad.

Also, and I hate to say it, that RiffTrax theme makes my skin crawl. It’s so cringey.

FUCKING FIREFLY. It’s a miracle I ever watched that terrific show based on that fucking song.

I made the horrible decision to go as Anton Chigurh from No Country For Old Men one year. In Springfield, IL. I painted a plant sprayer silver to look like his killer compressed air tank thing. No one got it, no one knew why I was asking people to flip a coin, and I look absolutely nothing like him. I looked like an…

You should listen to the audio tape during the NYPD sting operation. It’s fucking horrifying.

HOW DO i GET OUT OF THE FUCKING GREYS WHY DO i EVEN BOTHER

Well I hope they keep the part where Michael Myers MAKES ME RANDY BABY, YEAH! SHAGADELIC! GET IN MY BEL-LY!

I have never found these masks creepy or scary. Didn’t that movie Valentine use the same mask? In short, I am prepared to hate this film.

I know who I want to see paired.

Her?

WALLLLSS

HE’S NOT AS GOOD AS HE ONCE WAS, BUT HE’S AS GOOD ONCE AS HE EVER WAS.

As Adam Scott: “I’m sorry...did you just say Ghosted at least made you want to come back and see a little more?”

Ummm did you just assume Jared’s gender?

By the looks of this, Tom Cruise should play Tig Notaro

I am sorry you had to endure even a single second of this.

I hate when I start hoping my heroes die before they say some stupid shit that is gonna fuck their legacy. YOU HEAR ME, ANGELA LANSBURY YOU KEEP YOUR FUCKING MOUTH SHUT

My vote? The Taco Bell Bell.