Welcome to America, Canada!

Could you guys put up a sample letter or something to make this a little easier? I'm trying to word a polite email to Tom Wheeler, and it's tough.

let me just mess with this lighter while i'm trapped inside a wooden coffin with a limited air supply.

This just took a turn into Saints Row territory.

Every day some bullshit headline on the internet tells me to BE AMAZED or I WON'T BELIEVE WHAT HAPPENED or THIS WILL MOVE YOU. You never are, and you never do.

She's lucky... most kids with congenital achromaticity usually don't grow out of it.

Yup. China really, ahem, screwed the pooch what with their one child law and a culture that favored male babies.

I have bad days. Hell, I'm having one right now, but I don't use it as an excuse to ruin other people's days. In fact, I'm purposefully avoiding Titanfall (among other multiplayer games) right now just because I don't feel like going off on anyone- I'm not gonna let my bad day turn into someone else's.

All they have to do is get rid of the notrils and lips. and BAM a million times better.

Nigel Megalodon...there's just no hiding this...

But without the firearm?

"... robbed the place with a machete two weeks later." <—-funniest statement in this entire article.

"I am a strong woman...I am in charge of how I look and I can change that and then change that again if I want," she said. "I'm not trying to look like Pamela Anderson here during her 'Baywatch' days. I'm trying to look like a very capable, very personal level-headed female who is an Academy Award winner."

My god, look at all you guys ganging up on a single person who simply pointed out that theres a bunch of gears that don't even connect to each other, a common mistake that's made by tons people who just paste gears on things to make it look more "steampunk" because.. Gears = Steampunk.

I was giving my husband a BJ and suddenly he got the giggles. I look over and here are my 2 cats just staring at me. Yes, I fuck in front of my pets because if I keep the door closed, they'll just paw and head butt the door, which ruins sexy times even more. Apparently, not only were my pervy cats watching us, but…

Dear Guys who think Porn is real life,

Kanye's an IRL vampire.

Finally, a piece about my country. Predictably, the press gets it completely wrong -_-