Fuck. Ted. Wheeler. I can’t stress that enough.

Just want to leave this here, for anyone not understanding how Border Patrol can operate in cities like Portland and Chicago: https://medium.com/@JennBudd9/how-trump-is-using-federal-agencies-to-invade-your-city-77a66070251c

Just a side note to this shitshow here in PDX: Ted Wheeler is not an ally. He is a big part of how we ended up at this outcome. Yes, it's nice that he is opposing this bullshit fed govt, but it is too little too late.

I came to say the same thing about Lake Oswego and West Linn. I lived in Lake Oswego for a time, and the amount of “we’re totally not racist, but haha isn’t it funny that we live in Lake NoNegro?!?! And let’s go get some tacos over in Hillsburrito! Soooo many good Mexican restaurants are over there!” They did not…

Well ain't this some bullshit. Fuck Jimmy S with a giant bag of dicks. 

Can I get an advanced copy? I read slow AF (why y’all rushin, damn) and only have one eye.

Oh no sir. Hold up.

This post should have it's timestamp changed so it is listed first! Think of all the pageviews you'll get from a cross promotion to Jezebel! What a great way to get more of those annoying non-sports humans of the female variety to start reading sports only posts!

Totally not super suspicious that this post is now showing first instead of the dog post.

Quite a few of the old KSKommenters are still going strong over at [Door Flies Open], just sayin. 

Nah son, don’t offend Lando that way! He's more like Boba Fett, so much hype only to fail spectacularly in his moments to shine. 

I'd bet good money that idiot fully believes they are called cock straps, because he's never been near one, has no idea how one functions, but thinks only real men wear them.

Luck has already submitted construction docs and permits to the city on his redesign of the stadium to address the numerous acoustics issues, too narrow seat and aisle designs, and the curious choice of building stairs instead of escalators for every section.

WHOOOOOOO BACKDRAFT 2: THE RE-BACKDRAFT-ENING

Gotdamn Drew. Gotdamn.

Holy Jeebus Fucklord, one of those looks like me so much that I had to check to make sure I hadn’t morphed into a Guy Fieri lovin, unseasoned chicken sammich with extra mayo eatin, visor wearin, ROLL TIDE, COORS LIGHT IS THE BEST BEER bro.

Add a bit of red wine and some fresh diced basil, salt/pepper to taste... let it marinate for a few hours... and voila, stuffed bearded clam for dinner!

Anytime I see the Seattle Supersonics of Oklahoma City lose is a good time. And when they lose to Portland, it turns my enjoyment up to 11. 

Sounds like Foster was trying to juggle too many Balls.