I love that he’s finally getting some consequences for his tweets! (this and Bergdahl’s sentencing)

I believe the original Jack O’ Lanterns were Irish turnips. I think carving them would be more like carving wood. As far as honeydews or other, softer melons, I can’t imagine them lasting more than a day after being carved. Pumpkins are probably just right for ease of carving and durability.

Hmm, people from Springfield are twice as smart as people from Shelbyville.

Did you hear? There is a heroin epidemic ! I don’t know whether to laugh or cry or throw my shoe at the TV. Last time I checked, only one person went to prison in Trainspotting.

Anybody, really, anybody would suffer in comparison to PBO and FLMO.

*Stares out the window, eyes welling up*

President until further notice.

You have to define the hours in“shift”, determine the turnaround or hours between shifts, and if you have to complete certain duties before a shifts end. Just ask a nurse.

Woman inherits the earth.

Woman inherits the earth.

That actually looks very damned unpleasant, especially since he was bound to the spinning brush by the pressure-washer hose and had essentially no chance of getting to a kill switch until the machine completed its cycle or somebody on the outside noticed that he was missing. All he can do is yell for help and hope…

Co-Anchor: Oh wow! Haha seems like Natalie’s having a hard time with that chip! Hahahaha. Hang in there Natalie!

Norway is about to free that terrorist who shot up a camp full of children

More often than not, a violation of constitutional rights doesn’t mean the violator gets punished, but rather the violated simply gets to walk out of court. The violation itself is not regarded a crime, it just invalidates the case built on it.

swearing isn’t against the terms/conditions of twitter. you can’t get kicked off or suspended for it.

That looks terrifically uncomfortable to fire.

“Basically, it let’s you pull the trigger once and empty an entire clip lickity split”.

Property taxes do not equal HOA, sorry.

The main rotor moves at 725fps or close to 500mph. Depending on air speed that can put it close to the speed of sound. Hitting a 5lb object at that speed can cause serious damage to pretty much anything.

They have stores for that!