I'm not trying to shrug it off though - it's not like I said well I sang it and everyone else sang it so it's fine and fuck anyone who disagrees with me. What I'm saying is that I love rugby, rugby made me a better person, a better woman, a better feminist to be honest and I'm honestly ambivalent about the…

Understood and thanks. Much respect for your personal experience and how it informs your thinking. I find myself (part of it is age) that my sports fandom — especially football — is more and more problematic to me, and I'm not sure how to deal with it. The misogyny, racism, economic inequality, etc. it exposes are…

Blinded by years of Rugby enjoyment, or by years of internalized misogyny?

while i agree that feeling "unsafe" was a total overreaction to the rugby players' actions, i also disagree that it was the most mature or respectful way to approach her. i just feel like discreetly emailing the feminist organization itself about a possible meeting would have been much more appropriate and would have…

The Prez of the rugby team should have approached the Prez of the feminist group...alone. If a group has been hostile, sexist, etc., I wouldn't be keen on them approaching me. Body language speaks volumes. So I don't find the woman "insufferable" based on the info provided.

But what about the people that aren't your teammates? It seems like this sort of attitude is a part of a lot of our social ills, I'm thinking specifically of the thin blue line.

I was one of those girls in college. In retrospect, I was deeply insecure and super happy to be accepted as a "cool girl." I smiled along and basked in the male approval, feeling safe in my knowledge that I was better than those "other" girls - the ones who were too stuck up to sing, or the sluts, or the stupid…

We had a pretty diverse team racially/sexually, and everyone sang them. If people made you drink because you messed up a lyric, you felt more like you fit in or were accepted. We were playing a sport that's one of the few that has nothing to do with finesse or attractiveness, and there was a sense of just wanting to…

*raises hand* I also have a huge problem with destination weddings. If you want to have a ceremony barefoot on some beach, go for it! Just don't expect me, or your family, to use up our vacation time and money just to watch it happen.

Only if you invite this guy!

These people are detestable.

Is Cheetah his given name? It seems is you name your child Cheetah it like a 98% chance he'll turn out to be a something like a man bun wearing acrobat who believes that his happiness is worth other peoples money, but then again if he named himself Cheetah than what can I say, I once dated a guy who called himself…

Will there be 38 divorces in 38 countries?

I love how you potentially/probably saved your and your coworkers' lives and a bunch of bros still chime in like "cool story, but I just reeeeeally need to correct you on this one thing that you weren't even wrong about". Way to prove the entire point of the article. (This gif is for them, not you, but I didn't want…

Did someone abuse/molest him? that is what usually triggers intra child abuse. It's a good chance that the family member who is lobbying most that he is telling the truth did something to him.

Anyone who has ever sat in a classroom/meeting/whatever and made a point, been told it's not exactly right, only to hear a man in the room repeat THE EXACT SAME POINT in slightly different words, and be told he's a visionary, has experienced the rage. It more or less sums up like 50% of graduate seminars, and no doubt…

I've taken to looking at my husband like a madman and telling him he needs to calm down so we can discuss things rationally whenever he starts getting upset or frustrated. The look I get in response is PRICELESS.

My brother is a serial fuck-up. He just cannot get his emotional shit together. he has a good job (somehow) but is in a loveless/abusive marriage and is an alcoholic. Despite this, members of my family consistently believe his narrative of our childhood over mine simply because he is male. He physically abused me…

This is why talking about issues women face spirals so quickly. "X happened to me." "Nah, it was probably something else altogether." We're considered unreliable witnesses and interpreters of our own experiences.