Hollywood, can we get a gritty reboot of the Ernest P. Worrell series? I want to experience all the psychological trauma of the Ernest films with more murder, rape, and torture sequences.

Ew.

I mean, to be fair, I'd want to be drunk too if I had to interact with all the hephalumps in Mickey Mouse hats.

Interesting premise, but it's annoying they have to make this a remake. Can't they invent their own fantasy world rather than steal from a well-known property?

And let's throw Alice in there, because one beloved fantasy world clearly doesn't work!

Johnny Depp needs subtitles. He sounded so drunk.

Are you friggin' nuts? He is an awful, awful writer. When he's not writing cliches, he's writing things like "the boat groaned like a fat man straining to take a shit."

Simmons was actually pretty complementary to Prince. Being an ego-maniacal asshole, he has to temper every compliment with a dick comment.

I know. Manson and Alice Cooper are involved in a lover's tryst with Johnny D.

Yuck, no.

He went to the Marilyn Manson School of Elocution.

Will he apologize for being in Alice In Wonderland 2?

Please, Bloodraven, it's the mother fucking zombie apocalypse. Don't give me that "We need to pace ourselves" bullshit.

Binge watching has ruined so much for me.

The guy who starred in Eragon has a lot of nerve.

Oh Christ can Seth MacFarlane just crawl back to Rhode Island and never blight the world again?

God damn, who do you have writing the comedy bits? Carmen Esposito?

Oh good, it will terrify thirteen year olds everywhere.
(And maybe make them murder somebody.)

Will Charles Band ever satisfy his killer puppet fetish?

Does anyone else think the Tyrion Dragon Whisper scene was stupid bullshit?
Everything else was generally alright, but that was dumb.