"I used to fix prolapsed monkey rectums when I worked at a primate breeding facility."

Mark. You're my favorite writer on here but you also make me want to take an anti-depressant. What does that say about me? Seriously, this story kills me. But I do appreciate that you write about stuff like this and child abuse, guns, etc.

Look, I don't want to pretend like I have this parenting thing completely figured out. But I think the argument that "kids will be kids, and there is nothing anyone can do about it" is pretty bullshit. It's the parents' job to teach their children how they are expected to behave in society. The expectation of…

My daughter is two and she knows "We do not use our hands for hitting people." If she cold-cocks one of her older brothers, she is sent to the naughty step to think about what she's done. If a pair of toddlers get it, an 8 year old can get it.

Yeah, I was gonna say. Maybe a 2 or 3 year old might take a swipe at their parent, but an 8 year old???

What the fuck are you talking about? "if i ever got physical during our fights"??? This is not normal behavior for daughters. Never in a million years would I have gotten "physical" with my mother, nor did I ever have any desire to, and neither would any of my friends with their mothers. My own daugher is 4 years…

I'm sorry, but are you really defending her hitting her mother? That is definitely not acceptable under any circumstances, so I don't think it the criticism of her behavior has anything to do with her weight.

Why do parents allow their kids to hit them??? I was waiting in line at a store and a kid who looked to be around 3 had a pacifier (he seems a bit old for a pacifier, but maybe I'm wrong) and when his mom took a book out of his hand to put it back on the shelf, he slapped her in the face. She didn't do anything! …

the child is acting HIDEOUSLY . i have an 8 year old and he has manners . something this little pig brat is clearly lacking .

There's a vast difference between "reflexively piss themselves" and "hitting a parent."

"the egregious criticism of overweight child stars" "incapable of viewing them as anything more than twinkie receptacles."

In regards to the record time, those shows are filmed much earlier in the day than they air. So her behavior, in part, was not from staying up too late.

because it's not a right you should have in the first place. it's a bullshit trumped up interpretation of the 2nd Amendment by your activist judges. fuck off

I don't know....how many first-graders have to be slaughtered in their classrooms before you mouth-breathers stop yodeling about your "rights being infringed upon?"

Oh, gosh. Hang in there, anxiety is such a vicious bitch - no kids for me, I couldn't handle the constant worry - two nieces and a disabled parent keep me on the edge.

So if a four-year-old gets hold of a gun left within his reach and shoots it, did he shoot it recklessly or intentionally? Or was that an accident? Just curious.

It makes me absolutely fucking livid that whenever something like this happens and someone has the GALL to mention some sort of legislation on gun control, you have all the people (some who are otherwise fairly reasonable human beings) crying, "Not alllllll gun owners! I'm responsible! I take lessons! I have a permit!…

I don't know if you're really joking —or playing off your desire to revoke the 2nd as a joke to try to limit the insane gun nuts. Either is fine, but I wish liberals would argue for a repeal —even if just to move the debate further left. Fuck these gun nuts. It's mind bending that there is a right to own a killing…

Really? Cause part of me completely agreed with your first sentence.

I think it's time the government seriously consider revoking our Second Amendment rights because these motherfuckers don't deserve it.