well, if nothing else, i can now see how he got his name.

Planes fly due to the Bernoulli effect. And because I know this, I was able to nail the goddamn New Yorker and their legendary fact-checkers such that they had to print this correction!

The Uncut Gems franchise really didn't hit its stride until Uncut Gems 3: Leather Tools and Family Jewels.

I heard a deafening iPhone camera click. What is the most reasonable explanation? Can I still be friends with him?

Francesa, whether in his fictitious character or as himself, declaring that as “the dumbest fuckin’ bet I’ve ever heard of” pretty much guarantees that bet is going to hit.

Assuming he gets killed, (which safe to say he does because when you have the chance to put that to film, you take it), you gotta think James Dolan just retires and watches that scene on repeat forever, like he’s Goldie Hawn in Death Becomes Her

No? Anyone else always feel like not doing what headlines like these tell you to do?

Brown’s reaction upon reading the headline.

Add to that McQueary was legitimately afraid of not only losing his job but also his entire career. If he was blackballed by Penn State, may as well go get that teaching certificate. Telling Paterno was a huge risk on his part. Completely agree that Gladwell is the lowest form of life for rehashing a settled matter,…

He wonders why McQueary remembers the campus as being deserted on the night he says he witnessed the assault (Feb. 9, 2001), even though there was a hockey game and a Barenaked Ladies concert on campus that night.

It’s not about being loyal to a stranger, it’s contrarianism as performative intellectualism.

There’s a very simple reason why McQueary didn’t go to the cops right away: sometimes when we see things that go against our pre-existing beliefs, our brains work their asses off to come up with reasoning. McQueary respected Sandusky as a football coach and seeing him rape a child was outside of what he expected. So…

Being a team player, not questioning orders, wage suppression, universal health care...sounds like college sports are clearly just a front to indoctrinate kids into the CPUSA.

“so, my email address is hashtag I don’t care, okay.

“Listen, for the amount of money I send to the alumni association, YA DAMN RIGHT I AM WRITING PAT’S POST-GAME SCRIPTS! Now, let me tell you about the dinner I had last night with Magic & Charles.” - Wilbon

FYI you did a really crappy job taping that fortune up, you probably should’ve just not bothered.

He doesn’t even get name dropped in the description. He should get top billing.

Considering Rob Schneider and David Spade are nowhere to be seen, I’m gonna go with the latter.  

Mike Francesa? What the hell?

your waiter/waitress has 3-4,000 tables under their purview, each with rapidly depleting beverages. it feels less creepy to stop in and ask a question real quick than it does to silently stalk past your table eyeballing your drinks to see how fast they need to get refills covered.