Lol...you really thought of everything that could have been dangerous about that situation...except for, you know, the fucking lawnmower, with sharpened helicopter blades whirling around at about the exact place you're body was being dragged towards:-/

I love a lot of you guys (and gals) for your insightful and often hilarious sports and culture writing...that said, you are a sad collection of uncoordinated weaklings, and I think my (kind and empathetic) small child of a son would absolutely eat you all alive and take your lunch money.

What about that doggy lick bacteria? That's been having a weird run of fucking people up lately?!

West end market, little Italy by Case Western, lake front, sports, restaurants, theater, museums...I'm a snob about a bunch of things, but Cleveland is better than most American cities, large or small...obviously it's a big country, and a dozen or so cities are way better, but it's not bad.

Sterno? Well ladida...listen to ol’ moneybags! Those of use who weren't born with a silver spoon in our asses...we'd top off our gas station malt liquors with kerosene...it's a little cheaper than the diesel fuel (no transportation taxes) but with the same kick!

Where was school? Western VT, north eastern NY, or north eastern PA?

Works great with coffee. Gives hot brew the same subtle smoothness as cold brew.

A little salt improves the flavor of lots of things. From water to coffee...beer to tequila. Have you ever tried putting a little on your food? Works great there too!

Don't be so sure...his is probably carved from oak and mahogany, with brass accents and leather trim. A bespoke internet experience, meant to be slowly savored.

We're way past that...this sort of behavior can only be explained BY RABIES!!! It's time to hope that his death is swift and painless, so his family won't have to change the channel for him much longer.

Holy shit! The “disgruntled player”? Is a dead fucking teenager:-( set this man on fire.

You got it all wrong! That little girl...and her asshole dad, are evil little fuckers, and we need to hound them to kill themselves 🙄

You're right! Minihane, forget it...your good to go...fucking do it.

Yeah, it’s good for that, if you want to leave it for a really long time, but honestly, just water pressure alone is enough to remove the air...you just need to secure the less sealed part of the bag, above the waterline in the immersion cooker. And as far as long term vacuum sealing? Like for preservation? It’s…

I'm a chef. I don't have a realistic use for a gadget like that for home cooking. But at work, it would be completely inadequate. It just doesn't work to create a vacuum. Barely a step above sucking the air out of a ziplock with your mouth.

That's odd...I always assumed you also drive a windowless van.

What, “2 hour, in state flight”, boards at like, 3:30/4:00 AM??? 

Yes. True, you might be too dumb...I don’t know if I agree, but he still saying this is an example of someone receiving one, yet still productively contributing to society.

Also, if they “accidentally” kill a 280,000 pound whale, “mistaking” it for a 16,000 pound minke? Now you're just tying yourself into knots (like nautical knots...again, sorry)

I accept I’m a bit of a hypocrite in dealing with the morality of meat consumption. I accept that my line drawn is an arbitrary one. But dolphins have porpoise-ly (sorry) helped distressed people and prevented drownings and predator attacks. It’s hard to thoughtfully look at something like that as “food”. I looked up…