!

You don't. You just buy a new one.

I noticed that in the very picture that heads this article, the viewer is being invited to check out the evidence and decide for themselves.

If they get the jacket on layaway, it can pay for itself.

Careful. If the Russians get ahold of the Gerber Shard, all is lost!

I interpreted it as being like a storage warehouse. The company give you the keys, you (presumably) sign some bullshit pledging not to use the place to do anything illegal - and when the cops eventually find all your illegal shit in your locker, the company can say entirely truthfully that they didn't know and had no…

...it seems like there should be a hilarious punchline there that you're screwing us out of.

The fuck it is.

Such is the difference between our generations.

It means "We received your paper and it had your name on it."

These "ACTUALLY..." posts are more off putting than those pictures.

I like this post because it contains no meaning whatsoever but a lot of heart.

Spare me your medical mumbo-jumbo, Doc - do it get HBO?

Go ahead... THROW YOUR VOTE AWAY! HAHAHAHAHA!

This would be epically retarded even if two of the closest characters to villains we've been introduced to so far hadn't been shown to have understandable and non-evil reasons for doing shady shit.

That was probably one of the best ever South Park episodes. It's given us so much. And by "so much", I mean "derp" and "tree fiddy".

This post is so charmingly naive, I just want to hug it for 40 minutes and whisper "It's all gonna be alright" in its ear.

Fired? The players aren't even being paid - it's not as if it actually matters.

That looks like it was taken on the set of a gay porno movie.

You've wasted your life.