Here’s hoping they fail and the league contracts them in fewer than five years.

I’d be inclined to believe her friend, it’s clear he beat the s out of her. Well, one of them at least.

Why is there a toad sitting next to Louie CK?

I DEMAND YOU HIT MY CAR AGAIN UNTIL EVERY SIDE IS EQUALLY SMASHED IN!

thank fuck you aren’t a GM.

And the lawyer can ask for it by saying to the judge “Your honor, I move for a bad court thingy.”

There’s alternate definitions but subtweeting is usually when you tweet without actually tagging them so they don’t get a notification, but it can still be a direct call out. You’re think of shade where the key is to subtly include them without direct naming.

*flips table*

Ironically, if you believe this story, he should still remain suspended for being a person who drinks kombucha.

My buddy’s son has a friend who was convicted of a DUI. He had a in-dash breathalyzer by order of the court. When the order expired his parents paid to keep the monitor in the car. This kid is no damn fun at parties.

Well, the test was registered via his tether which is around the rim of his ankle. So a better search would be to go on Backpage and look for rim jobs.

I don’t want to enable a criminal but your can usually find someone who’s willing to take a breathalyzer for you, especially for money. If you read this, Michael Floyd, it’s in Craigslist. Search “Blow Jobs.”

Ballparking it here. 220lb man drinks .5% abv teas until 3am, blows a .055 at 5:30am. Expected BAC of .08 at 3am. At .5% abv, and assuming he drank them over course of say 3 hours, that’s 48 twelve ounce bottles of Kombucha tea.

Exactly! My high school taught “microeconomics,” i.e. household budgeting, balancing check books, how not to get in over your head in loans, etc. I found out that being taught that in high school is the exception rather than the rule.

Maybe we should focus a little more on educating our next generation with things that…

Maybe I’m misunderstanding your point. But are you saying that if a bank offers you a loan that is more than you could (or should) afford, yet you take it anyway, it is the bank’s fault?

If that is your opinion, then how is it not also Porsche’s fault for making 6 figure cars that I want yet cannot responsibly afford?

The typical buyer replaces their car every 3-5 years. This is part of the problem right there - this means most people are treating their car loan like a revolving loan. Between the various sources of advertising for banks, car manufacturers, and dealers, the costs associated with this kind of long term indebtedness…

“Gee, I wish we could have gotten a sixth round pick for our #2 overall bust.”

I’ve never happy-cried. Am I some kind of monster?

That woman with the puppets should be shot.